twodragonspirits

I made the biggest mistake I think Iā€™ve ever made.
          	
          	After years of moving around and never staying in one place, my family finally settles in this town. Iā€™ve grown to love this town. I know quite a bit of this place now, more than I ever cared to learn when we lived anywhere else. 
          	
          	I finally allowed myself to put down some roots. 
          	I finally found a place to call home that didnā€™t just mean my family (though thatā€™s what makes most of my home). 
          	
          	And now I have to leave again. By myself and knowing that one day within the next three years Iā€™ll be out for good. 
          	
          	I donā€™t get to watch my siblings grow up anymore. 
          	I donā€™t get to be with them and hug them and love them the same anymore. 
          	I donā€™t get to tell my parents Iā€™m coming home every day when Iā€™m out of the house. 
          	I donā€™t get to sit and eat dinner with my family and play games with them and join them on adventures anymore. 
          	I donā€™t get to tell them all goodnight knowing Iā€™ll go up and see them in the morning. 
          	Itā€™s like Iā€™m not allowed to be with what makes up some of my very core. 
          	
          	I love it all too much to let it go. 
          	But I have to.
          	
          	ā€¦But when you cut the roots from the tree, 
          	It withers 
          	The leaves curl up and rot 
          	The branches decay and fall
          	The treeā€¦ it dies. 
          	
          	ā€¦I donā€™t want to die. 

-Vksel-

It has been so long since I checked wattpad!! How are you doing?

twodragonspirits

@-Vksel- oh same with the stress
            I hope you did well!!
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-Vksel-

@twodragonspirits pretty good, just stressed with school lol
            I get my scores for my first term exam tomorrow and I'm scared djdjdjdjd
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twodragonspirits

@-Vksel- Iā€™m doing alright. I havenā€™t been on much either ngl. Hbu?
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twodragonspirits

I made the biggest mistake I think Iā€™ve ever made.
          
          After years of moving around and never staying in one place, my family finally settles in this town. Iā€™ve grown to love this town. I know quite a bit of this place now, more than I ever cared to learn when we lived anywhere else. 
          
          I finally allowed myself to put down some roots. 
          I finally found a place to call home that didnā€™t just mean my family (though thatā€™s what makes most of my home). 
          
          And now I have to leave again. By myself and knowing that one day within the next three years Iā€™ll be out for good. 
          
          I donā€™t get to watch my siblings grow up anymore. 
          I donā€™t get to be with them and hug them and love them the same anymore. 
          I donā€™t get to tell my parents Iā€™m coming home every day when Iā€™m out of the house. 
          I donā€™t get to sit and eat dinner with my family and play games with them and join them on adventures anymore. 
          I donā€™t get to tell them all goodnight knowing Iā€™ll go up and see them in the morning. 
          Itā€™s like Iā€™m not allowed to be with what makes up some of my very core. 
          
          I love it all too much to let it go. 
          But I have to.
          
          ā€¦But when you cut the roots from the tree, 
          It withers 
          The leaves curl up and rot 
          The branches decay and fall
          The treeā€¦ it dies. 
          
          ā€¦I donā€™t want to die. 

twodragonspirits

So I went cold turkey on meds a while ago (I was doing fine, and psychiatrist agreed to have me stay off if I was fine). I was doing well, but then my mental health started tanking after a few months, so I just started them again. 
          
          I hate side effects. These muscle jerks are the worst, too. Iā€™m exhausted. 
          On the upside, because I was feeling so dizzy and sick, I got to watch the entirety of Ninjago Skybound (S6), so thereā€™s thatā€¦ 

twodragonspirits

@-Vksel- I liked it tbh. 
            
            Ngl Iā€™m probably going to delete these recent messages just because theyā€™re not important/relevant anymore-
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-Vksel-

@twodragonspirits hnnnn okay
            I haven't seen Ninjago in a while lmao, how was it?
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twodragonspirits

There are six months until Christmas
          
          Idk why, but the idea brings me such joyā€¦ probably because Iā€™ll be back home with my family between semesters. 
          Then again, itā€™s always been my favorite holiday, partially because I love giving people gifts, and partially because my family has all these fun, wholesome traditions that I definitely plan on continuing as I grow older. 
          
          But, yes-
          Six months! ^^ 

twodragonspirits

Is it ever going to be possible to live in a world where there wasnā€™t so much deceit, anger, bitterness, or hatred? Iā€™m really starting to lose hope. 
          
          People have acid for a tongue, with little care or patience for anyone who opposes them. Words are intentionally taken out of context and used to put the speaker on blast. People are called offensive for being different, and opposite sides have no problem throwing all the terrible labels at each other, from ā€œ-phobicā€ to other wordsā€¦ 
          
          There is no chance for healthy disagreement. There are tall, thick walls that are up that immediately deflect any arguments. And when something hits close to home, out comes the attack. 
          
          The accusations attack the person instead of the matter, thus throwing off the discussion and shutting the other down before answers are reached.
          
          ā€œWe just want to live our lives,ā€ everyone says as they spew vulgar accusations alongside it. 
          
          ā€œWe just want respect,ā€ they say as they snap into rage the second a different ideology crosses their way. 
          
          Pretty soon, ā€œwe wantā€ turns into ā€œyou areā€ and suddenly everything is black and bitter and foul. A person hates a person and we are not a healthy society, we are discordant, toxic, and dangerous. 
          
          Riots flare under the guise of ā€œWell, you arenā€™t listening to usā€. Bringing streets and cities to ruin itā€™s not how you make things better. 
          
          Itā€™s not that hard to not be offended, is it? 
          
          I guess it is. 
          
          Does it have to be that way? 
          
          Why? 

-Vksel-

@twodragonspirits people are sucky sometimes
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twodragonspirits

PSA with Celiac Disease
          
          Hey, Iā€™ve got a pretty serious message. 
          If you say something is gluten-free, please, please, please be sure it doesnā€™t have anything with gluten in it or that it hasnā€™t been cross-contaminated. 
          
          There was a bottle of marinade that my family used last night. Unbeknownst to us, the ingredient list included soy sauce that had wheat in it. I came home from work two hours early because I couldnā€™t stand the sickness and pain. I donā€™t make a lot of money, and Iā€™m a student. And gas prices have skyrocketed. I need all the hours I can getā€¦
          
          I feel terrible. Making sure everything is accurate matters. My body can tell if something is unsafe, and I hate discovering it the hard way. My body is currently attacking itself and making itself sick, and I canā€™t stop it because I ate the poison without knowing it was poison. There is no medicine, so I have to ride this out. 
          
          This is serious.
          I am in pain.
          I am sick.
          Please, be careful. Othersā€™ health literally depends on it.
          

-Vksel-

@twodragonspirits never got the notif for this but I see
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twodragonspirits

@-Vksel- I think I set them not to notify. I didnā€™t want to draw much attentionā€¦ kinda just an ā€œif you see it, great; if you donā€™t see it, also greatā€ situation?? 
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-Vksel-

@twodragonspirits Ah that's good ^^ I'm not sure if just didn't notice your announcements or you set them not to notify-
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-Vksel-

Crab
          
          
          I wanted to post by it out again

twodragonspirits

@-Vksel- ty, Iā€™ll need it ;v;
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-Vksel-

@twodragonspirits yeah, inflation really sucks. Again, good luck :>
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-Vksel-

What pronouns do you go by?

-Vksel-

@twodragonspirits oh just asking since like- just in case I ever refer to you in 3rd person yk
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twodragonspirits

GHHHHHHH
          I HAVE BEEN CLEANING/PACKING
          FOR HOURS NOW
          I TEND TO LEAN BACK ON MY HEELS TOO
          SO MY FEET HURT QnQ
          
          BUT Iā€™m almost done! I just have to finish and do my job so I can leave, and then Iā€™m good to go! 
          Just not looking forward to dragging stuff to my car since itā€™s all the way across the parking lot- 
          
          Sorry, itā€™s been a day, Iā€™m tired, I have a HUGE final to do still, my body hurts, but/and Iā€™m excited to go home ^^
          
          Have a good day/night, yā€™all!

twodragonspirits

@-Vksel- thanks! 
            Iā€™ll be fine after a little rest
            Iā€™m just not used to being on my feet as much anymore lol- 
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twodragonspirits

@Sparkk876 I got used to the standing
            It would have been more fun tbh if people took me seriously
            But Iā€™m little
            So I was treated as a 15-year-old by patrons 
            And other employees didnā€™t try so our managers were angry a lot with them- 
            
            If I could carry it all I would, 
            But
            I have little t-Rex arms (which were probably wings, from what Iā€™m hearing) 
            And Iā€™m not strong
            And I have more than one big thing to carry
            So lots of walking it is!
            Ngl I probably need the physical activity- 
            
            Thanks!! ^^
            
            Yea
            Iā€™ll do my best.
            Itā€™s just gonna be hard because anatomy and physiology is hard 
            BUT
            Iā€™ll be okay! 
            
            Ye ye!
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