alexis' ugly stepsister. [i'm joking she's the hot one]

this fine ass woman here is lauren, my baeeee.
she's 69 years old.
hey,guess why lauren can't count to any higher than 68?
cause 69 is a mouthfull. wink.
um but yes i'll be sensible and try not to be dirty now. but lauren is my babyyyy sis, she's 19 i think woops, look at old me. 20. god. anyway, back to lauren. she's married to the love of her lifeee, jakey. he's my brother. in law. i'm married to his brother. god damn it's a small world. 
they have 3 children. they're all sweet and they're mine and laurens so back tf up. jokes. they're lauren and jakes but im da godmother.


if you hurt lauren i promise to formally rip out your lungs and disect them into a thousand pieces until you can't hurt anyone else. and then i'll chop of your head and put it on a spear and shove it into your babymommas stomach. woops cx

but i love you lauren, my bby.
lots and lots
and lots.

your big, annoying,  stupid, funny, dirty, random, sexy af sister.
alexis. x