In my shoes (Completed)

Melanin dripping leave me alone (42)

AN: please vote for this chapter

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Kapinga POV

"Kapinga, it is your mom. She just passed," were the words the kept echoing in my head. It had been three days since those words had been uttered and ever since then those words kept ringing in my head.

It was still very early in the morning as the sun had not yet made an appearance. I could not sleep at all. For the past three days, I had been stuck up in my room. Everything felt numb. My body weighted a ton and I just could not feel anything anymore.

But today I had to get out of bed. They were burying my mother. The king had taken charge of organising the funeral so all I had to do was pitch up. I still could not believe that the king was in love with my mother. But more importantly that my mother loved the king too. But I was thankful to the king for finding her. Even if it was just for a few days. I was eternally grateful to him. I guess it made sense now why the king and Aunt Martha were close as well.

After a few more minutes of lying in bed, I reluctantly pulled myself out of the bed and started preparing for my bath. I had not taken a bath in two days and I smelt. My hair was tangled because I did not plait it before I went to bed. It was going to be a long time before I could get it to look proper.

I really wanted to say that I hated the prince after his revelation, But I could not. I was hurt yes, hurt that he lied to me. Hurt that he thought it was fine to take me for a fool. But I still could not bring myself to hate him. And I resented myself for this. For being so weak that I could not hate him despite how much he used me.

Shoving the thoughts of the prince away, I grabbed a spray bottle and quickly wet my hair. Then I began finger detangling the strands of hair slowly such that I don't cause my hair to break. This was the start of a very long process. But at least it kept my mind busy and away from all the depressing thoughts.

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After about 2.5 hours, I had successfully managed to detangle, pre-poo, wash and air dry my hair. I was now sitting down in a towel about to start caking my hair with the oils and serums. The natural hair struggle was serious. But I must admit the outcome was definitely worth it as my hair always ended up encircling my face like a crown.

"Kapinga we are leaving in 30minutes!" Aunt Martha shouted from behind my door. The funeral was set to start at 9 am and it was only 8 am now. But I guess we still needed to walk to the palace anyways. So, I quickly stopped doing my hair and rushed to get dressed. I could always come back and finish the routine later.

"Let us go," Aunt Marth shouted. At which I finally existed my room for the first time in ages. As soon I got out the room, Mukendi wrapped himself around my torso. I smiled down at him and ruffled his hair. He seemed to have taken mum's passing much better than I did. Which I was grateful for because I finally had time to feel all the emotions I had hidden up.

Aunt Martha then cleared her throat and said, "We have to leave now." To which I intertwined my hand with Mukendi's and walked out the house. We all walked in silence to the palace. The only sound audible was the heavy release of air Mukendi gave out every once in a while. When we reached the palace gates, the guards opened up the doors for us and let us in quickly.

Mom had no other friends here in Safe Heaven. It was only us her family and the king's family present. A small number indeed but at least she got a proper funeral. We never got dad's body back when he died. I was walking silently unware of my surroundings until I heard my name.

"Kapinga," Prince Muamba said. He was standing at a distance staring at me with pleading eyes. As I looked at him, I could not help but admire him in a black suit. The cloth clung to his form like a second skin. His eyes were back to the stormy grey and they were overflowing with emotion. I could not really pinpoint any of the emotions from this distance. As I started back at him I heard Aunt Martha whisper to Mukendi, "Let us give them some space child." Then I heard their footsteps slowly fade away.

We were alone.

The prince then came and stood in front of me, "Can I have a word with you please?" He asked. I simply nodded my head in agreement. To which the prince then turned around and motioned for me to follow him. So I did.

As soon as we entered some room I had not seem before I blurted out, "Why did you lie?" It was the only question that I had been dying to have answered.

The prince seemed taken aback from my question for a split second and then he masked it with a straight face.

"I could not tell you who I was, that would result in me failing my mission," he answered smoothly. As if he had practised this before.

"That is all you have to say for yourself?" I asked. I was way too tired and drained to fight with him. I just wanted the truth and reason behind it all. Because I was very confused right now.

"I wanted to see you Kapinga. I wanted a chance to show you that I really do like you. I was not lying when I told you that before," He said back. His eyes were looking back at me with hope.

Looking directly back at those eyes I had come to cherish I said, "Have you ever looked at things from my perspective? When I worked here in the castle you treat me like rubbish. You made me cry in front of your father and friend by insinuating that I was some prostitute. Then when I ask you why you hate me you say you don't. Only to come back at me two days later and claim you like me. And you expect me to somehow believe that?" I asked. There was no anger present in my voice. After all, I was just stating facts.

The prince was taken aback by my speech so I went on, "Then when I finally leave to get away from you, you follow me. Only this time with a different persona. Then you get me to fall for you only to break my heart in this persona by hooking up with my best friend! And then have the nerve to come to me and say that you like me when you lied to me all this time," I said. By now the tears were rolling down my face and my voice was enveloped by pain. I was hurt. He hurt me and it was time he knew that.

"I don't know what is wrong with you, but please...please for the love of everything that is right with this world leave me alone," I said and before waiting for a response turned around and left the room. 

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QOC: Thoughts on Kapinga's decision? Was she justified or not?

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