Meant To Be

The Heart Break Part 2

I couldn't send anything else. I checked all of my social media accounts and I received nothing. He was gone. Dead and gone.

Two and half years all burned to ash in less than three minutes. Everything we have been through all gone. Nothing left but shattered pieces.

I don't even know if I did something wrong. No matter how many times I read the texts, it doesn't make sense.

Did I say something wrong? Why would he do something like that? WHY?

I thought this would be the last time I felt like this. But damn it! Here I am once again. Sitting in bed trying to figure where it all went wrong for me to end up in this situation. What happened to not breaking up again?

Damn it! Damn it all!

I grip the phone harder and throw it across my room really hard.

Sighs.

I lay my head back and massage my forehead when I caught the sight of my promise ring. I look at my ring finger and frown. I used to smile every time I saw this ring on my finger but now I'm frowning and about to cry.

I take the ring off and look at it carefully. It's a 10 carat sterling silver ring with my birth stone and small diamonds surrounding the big emerald stone. It had my first name engraved on one side of the ring and Saul's last name engraved on the other side. The inner part of the ring was engraved with "His Queen".

I snorted looking at the ring. This ring now represents nothing but broken promises. I throw the ring away and listen as it makes a loud clunk sound on the floor.

I go back to massaging my forehead. I wonder if he still has his wedding band on his finger that I gave him. Even though we were in two different states, we made it work. We broke up three times, this would be our fourth. Although we broke up 3 times, both of us had legitimate reasons for why we wanted to break up. There was only one time during those 3 times that we broke up that hurt me so much like right now.

We don't go back to each other because one of us feels lonely or something like that but because we still love each other so much. Both of us always love the saying "if it's meant to be; it'll be" because we always come back to each other. No matter how hard we try to stay away from each other something just tugs us back together without both of us trying.

This time however, I don't get the feeling that we'll be back together because this time it's for real. It's going to be so hard trying to get over someone who you are still in love with.

I curl myself up into a ball in my bed and start to silently cry in the night. Letting the tears flow endlessly down my face until I cried myself to sleep.