They Call Me Montgomery

 Prologue

I don't know why I'm writing this letter. It's not like I'm going to send it anywhere or to anyone... I feel like I need to confess my actions even if it's to a pice of paper. I have done some really bad things in my lifetime, trust me. Yes, I cheated on my husband with his best friend, yes I went out to Seattle to try to fix things with him, yes I ruined hi relationship with his wife for a long time. One thing though that I do not regret was having a child. I know it seems impossible right. When did I get pregnant and who was the dad. Well first off lets get one thing straight. Me being pregnant with Mark's baby, yeah that never happened. I lied. Now you are probably wonder why. Well here is the thing, it was the only way to cover up my real pregnancy. Before Derek left me, I must of got pregnant. I never thought I was. I was so busy with work, I never even noticed. When Derek left that night, I sat alone and cried in my room. Then, I noticed my stomach was bigger and I was craving pickles, which I hate. My eyes widen as I came to the realization that I was pregnant. I ran into the bathroom snd took a pregnancy test. Sure enough it was positive. I was so scared I didn't know what to do, so I liked to everyone. I decided to give birth and put the baby up for adoption. I would not tell anyone anything. Except one day I was at work, looking at a pregnancy book when Mark walked in. He looked at me and realized I was pregnant. He asked me who the father was and I couldn't tell him it was Derek's. I didn't want him to know about our child and that I was giving him or her up for adoption, so I lied and told him it was his. I told him I was going to terminate the pregnancy. I didn't see Mark again for awhile. He was avoiding me. While Derek was in Seattle I was in New Year reaching closer snd closer to my due date. The day finally came. I went into labor. I went to the hospital and the doctors told me there were things wrong. I was pulled into an emergency c-section and i started to bleed out on the table. Thank gosh the doctors could save me and my uterus. In the end I gave birth to a beautiful baby girl.  I refused to look at her or even name her. The adoptive parents came and took her. Before they left the hospital, they told me what they named her. They said they named her Allison, Ally for short. They said it was close to my name so she would always have a little piece of her biological mother even if she didn't know it. I never got to see her or say goodbye, which at the time I thought was a good thing. Days later, the doctors told me I could leave and that my uterus was fine. They said having more children though might be challenging. I didn't care, at the time. I went back home and sat in the dark for a while by myself. Then it hit me. I just gave up my baby girl. I instantly regretted it. I decided to go find Derek and bring him home. I needed someone. After realizing happiness with Derek was not going to happen, I set out to Los Angeles. I met Jake and we adopted a little boy named Henry. It's been almost 16 years now, and I think about my baby girl everyday. I wonder where she is or what's she's doing. I hope one day she becomes successful and meets someone who she can spend the rest of her life with. I miss her so much and I wonder if she knows I exist. I just wish I could see her and tell her I love her even if she can't love me back.

- Addison Montgomery

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hope everyone had a safe and happy new year! love all of you immensely and thank you for the support!

~ jules :)