❝Perhaps something beautiful is lost within the clouds that hide Tomorrow.❞
Taunted by the ever-present pieces of the past, Taehyung never thought their situation could get worse when given the chance to fly to New Zealand with the others.
Then thei...
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⤷ . TAEHYUNG﹑⭔
six weeks before the crash|
Bang. Bang.
It's been months but the day we were no longer bulletproof is still fresh in my mind. Yet here I am, three months later, passing my last day at the dubbed 'recovery retreat' on the outskirts of Daegu, with the feeling that I've made zero progress from when I first got here.
Aside from the impending fear that paparazzi would stumble upon this place and create a scandal over V of BTS being spotted at a psych hospital, my stay wasn't too bad. It was everything Namjoon had said it would be. I had more freedom than the patients here, I could roam Daegu as much as I want with the accompaniment of Kangtae, lead aerobics classes and have time away from the craziness of Seoul. It was more of an escape than a hospital stay after all.
It didn't take away the flashes behind closed eyelids or the morphing of slamming doors into two resounding gunshots but it was close to home.
Kangtae, the guy in charge of watching me for the past couple of months sits on the armchair across from me. Only the top of his mop-like black hair is visible over the children's book he's been obsessed with. One of his girlfriend's books: The Boy Who Fed on Nightmares.
The afternoon crawls by like a sloth stuck in a pool of superglue. One last 'little chat' with Dr. Oh later and I'm sitting cross-legged on the staircase in the lobby with my back against the creatively chaotic and colourful mural practically bursting from the wall while I wait for one of the managers to get here.
The sun has just about set when the doors of OK swing open. "TaeTae guess who's here!" Jin-hyung screeches. Before I can blink once, he's bolting up the stairs and squishing me into a tight hug.
I take control of my surprise and return the gesture, "I didn't know you were coming."
"It was a last-minute thing."
Something licks my ankle. I gasp and look down to find Yeontan staring up at me wagging his fluff tail. "You even brought Tannie!"
"The others were still at the company so I brought this guy along instead," he grins, separating us for a moment before he squeezes me again. "Taehyung I missed you."
"Me too." Yeontan claws at my pant leg. "You too, Yeontan."
The almost three-hour drive back to Seoul is filled with Jin-hyung's chatter about the busy month ahead. Group therapy with a specialist, songwriting, recording and a trip to New Zealand for another season of Bon Voyage while Pdogg wraps up the production.
It may be a stretch. Three months isn't a lot of time but I can only hope it's enough to erase it all. I can only hope everything goes back to how it was. It may be a delusional dream but if I can step back onto a stage, everything might be how it used to be.
A hand waves in front of my face. "Yah Kim Taehyung did you hear anything I said?"
I look up from my fingers intertwined with Yeontan's fur. The car has stopped and Jin-hyung is turned in his seat towards me. "Huh?"
He sighs and waves his hand. "It's nothing."
I nod and climb out of the car.
I glance around our dorm's garage. When did we get back?
Everything is familiar yet foreign at the same time. A varied amount of new empty boxes sit stacked against the wall by the door and I'm sure the lights used to be duller.
The old alarm clock sitting on a shelf beside Jungkook's car reads '00:00'.
00:00.
It's time to go home, to return to normal and launch into tomorrow. Still, that's easier said than done. I'm not elastic, I don't bounce back when I'm stretched. Lost between the hours between dusk and dawn, I stand in the dark, grappling to find the slightest trace of tomorrow.
_________ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐✈︎
01.02.2021
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