sweven // chase rutherford

iii

y/n's pov ://

        i really just dozed off the rest of the class period. i'm not sure if it was because i was tuning out miss thomas's voice or if i just really fucking hated math. both. definitely both.
     i stared intently at the clock, waiting for it to strike 9:45. i've always noticed that staring at a clock makes it move way slower. i looked away. 9:42. miss thomas rambled on about things that i'll never need to know in the future as i let my mind wander further. him. i felt my heart pick up in pace as i stared down at my shoes. he said he was gonna be out there waiting. what if he forgot? what if he lied to me? what if he planted a hidden camera in the hallway to catch my reaction to being stood up to post to his tiktok account with a massive 2.6 million following? i felt like shit. but not in a completely terrible way, like the kind of shit you feel when your heart is pounding over every little detail of something, but you're still excited for it, but you hate that you're excited for it, but at the same time, it feels nice to be excited for something, and-
the bell rang.
         i quickly stood up, hitting my thighs against the desk loudly. i bit my lip as i avoided the weirded-out stares i received in response to whatever tomfoolery i just pulled. i pulled my backpack up from beside my desk and shuffled out of the room quickly. as i walked out, my heart dropped at the sight. every generic cult film highschool clique doing highschool clique things, but no chase. i looked around, desperately looking, feeling pathetic for getting so worked up about it. it's not like he wasn't easy to spot in a crowd- he was taller than almost anyone in the school, and his dark curls stood out pretty well. i felt the tears coming on. fuck. fuck. fuck. i stared down at my shoes, letting all the loud noises hit me harder. until a soft "hey, let's go. you've got english next."
      my breath hitched, eyes widening as i realized how stupid i probably look to him right now. "r-right," i said, starting towards the left of the hallway. "hey, y/n!"
he said my name.
"you're going the wrong way,"
he said my name.
"come here, bitch!" he said in a jokingly snappy voice.
he said my name.
chase.
oh shit.
i turned swiftly and headed in his direction, sniffling a bit. "sorry, i decided to be bold and take the long way." i muttered. he laughed, catching up to me. "what's wrong?" he said. he sounded serious, too. i didn't blame him. i looked fucking crazy. "nothing, let's go to english!" i exclaimed sarcastically, and walked faster. he walked at the same pace, his long legs carrying him further. i glanced up at him. his eyes had this nervous look on them. it looked familiar. his brows were furrowed in a specific concern i knew all too well. we walked in silence as i followed him down the stairs and turned into another hall. he stopped me outside of a door. "so, y/n,"
my name.
"yeah?" i forced myself to look up at the collar of his shirt. i didn't want him to see the bundle of nerves i must've looked like.
he stared down at my pocket where the schedule was. knowing his gaze was on me made my cheeks burn. i instinctively took the schedule out of my pocket and handed it to him.
"we both have 2nd lunch." he grinned at me.
"oh, yeah," i pictured the chaos of a highschool cafeteria. "that's actually amazing, cause like," i stopped.
"the library is always free at lunch. i know it's shitty to eat in the presence of so many great pieces of literature, and it's also against the rules, but i feel like we should be spontaneous and break in."
i could feel his smile through his words. my heart was beating so fast, it might as well start palpitating. "yeah, that sounds great," i replied in a fake nonchalance, giving him a smile back while avoiding the eye contact.
"see ya then," he held his fist out, motioning for a fist bump. i let out a giggle and bumped it. "see ya then."

•••

     english was good. my teacher was a young, intelligent dude named mr. riley. he was witty and taught the class well. and he didn't make it hard for me to catch up, unlike other teachers... i loved english. it always seemed to come to me naturally. it was one of the only things in the world i casually loved. this time around, class went by fast. which sucked because i actually like english, but it was good because i had an excuse to think of what i would say to chase the next time i saw him ; this also meant i would spiral into my millionth hole of anxiety for the day. sure i got anxious about a lot of things, everyone does, but boys never really made me that nervous. until him. it was annoying, but mostly embarrassing. because i could always make up all these excuses for myself, but i really think i knew what the reason was deep down. maybe it's because he stood at a staggering height. or maybe it's because he had a massive social media presence. or maybe it's because we seemed to touch hands a lot. or maybe it's because he's the first person my age i've talked to in texas. or maybe i really liked the way his dimples look when he smiles, even if i've only caught glimpses of it. or maybe i liked the little chuckle he did whenever i was being involuntarily stupid. i thought about his tiktoks. it seemed like every time i thought about it my stomach turned in the same way.
maybe he made me nervous because i wanted to be his person, but he had 2.6 million others to choose from.
2,600,000 was going to be the death of me.

hi i feel like i'm updating way too much but i'm actually getting invested in my own story 😫😫 but next chapter is gonna have a lot of chase in it i promise <333