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Jesus after making us

-

Bee : where do you want to be in five years?

Lauren : *mumbles* hopefully in your bed

Bee : what?

Lauren : I SAID HOPEFULLY DEAD

(I'm sorry)

-

Angel : I keep my friends close and my enemies dead

-

-us playing monopoly-

Angel : I will destroy you and everything you love!!

me : but what if we love you?

Angel : jokes on you I've been self-destructive my entire life

-

Lauren : I'm pansexual which means you're all at risk

Lauren : *points at me*

Lauren : I'll start with you and work 'round

-

me : let's go on the horse tornado!

Snek : Latte, it's called a carousel-

-

me : I'm a lesbian and I'm confused

Sunny : ???

me : oh, not about being a lesbian. I just never know what's going on.

-

me : peer pressure me into taking risks!

Sunny : DO IT OR YOU'RE STRAIGHT

me : I said peer pressure not THREATEN

-

Bee, banging on the bathroom door : Char hurry up and come out!

me : I'm a polyamorous lesbian demigirl!

Bee : not what I meant but I support you!

-

all of us -Bee : so you're taking Bee out on a date?

her future wife : yep!

all of us, deadpan : hurt her and we will murder you in cold blood

her future wife :

all of us : anyways, enjoy your date! *skips away*

-

me, on the phone with Angel : so how's the baby sitting going?

Angel : I LOST IT

me : damn they're really driving you up the wall?

Angel : NO I LOST THE BABY

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