✰there are flowers, in my heart✰

2

I heard those dreaded loud beeps and boops yell in my room.
I woke up, it's Friday.
My alarm echoed throughout my room, painting the white walls in my room.
I didn't wanna get up, I hugged my pillow harder, the alarm after a little just went through one ear and out the other.
Who am I pretending to hug?
I dont wanna get up, I don't wanna get up, I don't wanna get up.
Kiibo might be waiting for me at school, but he doesn't care does he?
He probably thinks I'm creepy and clingy, he probably doesn't want to see my stupid face.
Maybe he's not here today, but he's never not shown up, but my guts telling me to stay home.
I stared at my wall when I pulled the white flag, when I surrendered.
I thought about not wanting to get up, that by the time I did get up, I only had 20 minutes to get dressed, I couldn't take a shower.
I skipped breakfast, took my vitamins, brushed my teeth, did my hair, got dressed, and went outside my house to wait for my bus.

I hate this, I dont wanna go back to a routine.
I turned on my phone and started listening to music, waiting for my bus to come.
Once it finally came around the corner, I stood up and got on once it stopped.
When I got on my bus I got deep in thought.
Do I have a crush on kiibo?
No I can't, if I did it really proves how worthless I am, I wouldn't have a chance, I don't have a chance.
He's a robot, he doesn't love, he doesn't love me as a stranger, lover, enemy, or even friend.
He doesn't care for me, all of his emotions are fake—programmed, even.
He's supposed to look this way, and feel warm.
If I touch him, and he's cold, I can't tell if he's dead or not, he's not alive either way.
He doesn't care for me, he doesn't want me, he doesn't care to see me.
Before I realized, I saw the sign that pointed to the nearest pizza place that signaled to me and only me that I'm close to school.
I got upset, I don't wanna go back.
I really don't.
I sighed and grabbed onto my bag.

When I got to one of the two classes me and Kiibo have on B days, I smiled, I felt relieved to see him sitting at his table at the right side of the room, writing something down.
My body relaxed, my shoulders fell down, and my head leaned to the side and I smiled.
I felt warm inside, and my fingers fell from the fist I was holding.
I sat down at my spot that was pointing towards Kiibo, this rooms desks are U shaped, like something you'd see in a middle school, or is it normal to have this type of desk arrangement at my age?
I sat my head on my palm and awwed at Kiibo, he looked back up at me and glanced back down quickly, blushing I think.
I don't care if he likes me or not, that blush could've been from embarrassment, but Kiibo makes me feel good regardless.
I realized I need to grab my notebook and reached in my backpack and plopped it down on my desk loudly, trying to get ready for class fast.
Three girls at the bottom right of the desk arrangement snickered at me, but in a good way.
I skipped to the first blank page I see and wrote down what's on the board.
I feel happy now, I don't need to stare or talk to Kiibo to know he's there, that he's my friend, which makes a difference to me.

Once class was over, I pushed my stuff into my bag and got up to talk to Kiibo, when one the girls from earlier ran over to me and started asking me to help her study, I said sure without thought but was really focused on Kiibo.
When she smiled and ran away to her friends, laughing and being happy, I watched but then went over to kiibos desk, where he's already gone. He's in our next class, lucky I have him there too.
I paced quickly (didn't run, not enough time to get in trouble) and got to my next class and ran up to Kiibo.
There he is! Go keebs!
"Hey Kiibo!!!!"
"Ah! Don't be so loud!"
Wait think of something to talk to him about....
"Wanna hang out after school?"
"Where would we go?"
"Maybe your place?"
"Uhhh sure!"
"Oh cool!"
I smiled and giggled and hiccuped at Kiibo before I sat down, I giddy too much.
Do you think he can tell I like him? A little too much like him?
I opened my computer and got to work on this class's project, but I kept my eye on Kiibo, he sits 2 desks from me on my left, so I have to be sneaky.