16

256 7 4
                                    

I couldn't help but break into a smile, and before I really understood what he had just said I could feel the tears start to form in my eyes. I blinked them away and swallowed my emotions down. I pulled away from Wonwoo's intense gaze and looked out into the small river before us both.

In our warped reflections, I could catch a glimpse of the teenage boys that had walked this route many years ago. My heart began to ache ever so slightly. I leaned my head back and looked up at the darkening sky until finally, I let out a breath I had been holding in since I was fifteen.

"I'm sorry," Wonwoo repeated, in a way that demanded my attention. I turned and looked up at him once more.

I nodded and said, "me too," in the softest way I could have ever said it.

We just stayed there, after that. There was a strong sense of relief that could be left between the both of us. I sat on the dock floor and looked down at the fish in the river. As I watched them swim, I felt like I had been born again.

This was it. This had been my long-held secret. I was in love with Jeon Wonwoo for our entire friendship, and I never had the guts to tell him. And as I repeated this fact to myself, over and over again, I could feel the way my chest began to tighten once more. The tightness in my throat was troubling my ability to breathe.

I allowed myself to fall on my back and cry. At first, the action was silent, the occasional tear streaming from the corner of my eye onto the wooden floor. After a couple of seconds, however, I was full-on sobbing. Horrible noises were escaping my body, and if a stranger had been passing by, I knew they would have asked me if someone had died.

But that was just it: I felt like I had been reborn.

Slow and steady, Wonwoo crouched down and approached me. He helped me sit up and gently wrapped an arm around me. My crying had turned so ugly, in fact, that I had taken it upon myself to cover my face and try to hideaway. Wonwoo didn't pry, he didn't try to force his way in. He just sat beside me and pressed the side of his head with the side of mine.

"Thank you. I'm sorry I can't return your feelings, but I'm honored that you feel that way about me. Thank you, Mingyu, you really are a beautiful person," he said.

I think I just cried even harder.


"It's true! She was my high school crush! Never would've thought in a million years that she'd fall for my charms once we were in the big city," some guy exclaimed loudly beside me. All around, people were sharing similar stories. Stories of unrequited loves being fulfilled and transformed into adult romances. Stories of people confessing old feelings to one other were exchanged all around us, and as we listened to so many people say the same thing, Wonwoo and I simply looked at each other knowingly as we drank our beer and ate our beef.

"So," Wonwoo started, taking a quick sip from his draft beer and then placing it on the table, "Is there anyone new?" I knew what he was referring to, and the very question was enough to warm my heart at its very core. Never in a million years would I have thought that I would be able to talk about this stuff to Wonwoo. I broke into a smile.

"There is someone," I admitted, my heartbeat speeding up at the very thought of them.

"Wow, Mingyu, you never miss an opportunity," he teased, but his eyebrows were shot up in genuine interest. "What's his name?"

"There's no one yet, no," I shook my head, "I feel like I needed some closure here before I could move onto someone else." He nodded at my words, and it was nice to feel so seen.

"Is there anyone in your life now?" As I asked the question, I couldn't help but feel like I had overstepped my boundaries a bit. I was quickly put at ease, however, when Wonwoo laughed with glee. And as he struggled with re-composing himself, I lost myself in watching him. I watched the way his nose crinkled and the way he would try to hide his face by raising a hand to his mouth. I watched the way his glasses slowly slid down his nose the more he laughed, and the way he struggled to hold still for just a second to set them right. I basked in a sight I had been deprived of all my young adult years. I smiled.

Once he re-composed himself, he was quick to shake his head and say, "No." He then shrugged and then added, "just not really lucky in that department, I guess." He didn't say it sadly, but instead, in a more matter-of-fact way.

"Have you ever liked someone?" I spat it out before I could dwell on it for too long, "after Nayoung?"

It was the word we had avoided using up to this point, and I didn't really notice how much it had needed to be said until I felt a weight lift from my shoulders, allowing me to relax more. I was still scared, sure, but at least SheWhoShallNotBeNamed was out there now; it made her feel less powerful. Harry Potter had a point, after all.

He shook his head, then seemed to think better of it, and nodded. "I'm guessing it's complicated?" I asked and he laughed at that.

"Something like that," Wonwoo shrugged. "I met her recently. She's really nice and friendly, but I haven't seen her around recently. I think I might have lost my chance," Wonwoo admitted, the last bit coming out a tad muddled.

I patted his shoulder, hoping it'd come off as encouraging as I intended it to be. "Don't sweat it Wonwoo. You're a great guy, so you'll find someone eventually," I said, and he nodded at that. Then, he placed his hand on my own and gave it a slight squeeze.

"I'm glad we talked it out," he said suddenly, the sense of truth overpowering the playfulness we had finally been able to carry out.

"Me too," I admitted. With that, it seemed like it was too much truth for the day. I felt that we had done enough, and I was glad that perhaps, I hadn't lost what I had been missing for so long after all. At that very optimistic thought, I raised my beer to him and said, "to us and our future."

Wonwoo didn't miss a beat, and while raising his beer he replied, "to our future together." And as our glasses clashed, I was startled to hear us both declare: "forever."


Author's Note:

Thank you so much for reading Pandora's Box! I hope you enjoyed it. Full credit to this video:

for giving me the idea. When I watched this video, I could not help but imagine Wonwoo and Mingyu playing the mcs' roles. I decided then I better write it before someone else did, so here we are. Once again, thanks for sticking around until the end.

All the best,

jay xx

Pandora's Box | kim mingyu & jeon wonwooWhere stories live. Discover now