Losing Lily (Eli Moskowitz x Fem OC)

Teaser

met·a·mor·pho·sis
/ˌmedəˈmôrfəsəs/
noun ZOOLOGY
noun: metamorphosis; plural noun: metamorphoses
•a change of the form or nature of a thing or person into a completely different one, by natural or supernatural means.
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Everyone always says that high school is a time of metamorphosis for kids. A time for us to shed what we used to be and start becoming who we want. For most people, that meant getting off their braces or getting contacts to seem like less of a nerd.

For girls, it was finally getting noticeable boobs over the summer and not looking like a 12 year old boy anymore. Or going on a diet because they want an "hourglass" figure. For guys, maybe it was working out more to get muscles to flex or finding a good acne cream so no one called them 'pizza face' anymore.

One thing is for certain. These 'metamorphoses' were all about physical appearance and shallow identities. No one really cared if you were kind, or smart, or sweet. No...high school is the first hellscape of the rest of your life where you're taught that none of that is worth shit. Where you're taught that unless you're hot or popular, then you don't matter.

While I didn't believe in that way of thinking one bit...Eli Moskowitz did. And I should've seen the signs that he was slipping far away from who he used to be. We had met freshman year in science class and we paired up for projects often. He never said much but I enjoyed the calmness of his company.

He's always been taller than me. That will never change. But despite the way he always looked down to me, he somehow seemed to be the one intimidated by me. He has the deepest blue eyes that had such an innocent sweetness to them. His reddish brown hair was just long enough to swoop back out of his face.

Eli wore these sweaters and striped long sleeve shirts with collars, echoing his academic nature. He walked with his shoulders slightly up as if he were always on guard or trying to make himself seem smaller. Like less of a target. And when he spoke...his tone was soft and gentle, with an almost imperceptible stutter like he chose his words extra carefully. If you couldn't tell by now...I was completely into him.

Oh, I guess there's one more thing I should mention about Eli. Not that it matters to me, but it mattered to him. And it matters to this story. Eli has a scar on the right arch of his Cupid's bow that started at his nostril and forked into two as it got to his lip. It's the scar from the surgery of fixing his cleft lip as a child.

He'd been bullied for it all his life. The thing he hated most about himself. In all honesty, I didn't care about it at all. It had nothing to do with who he was as a person. Nothing to do with how he treated his friends. I usually forget he has it at all because I get so lost in his eyes when he's talking about the things he loves. The only time I see it is when my eyes are drawn to his lips...because I'm thinking about kissing him.

Maybe it's the way I was raised by my mom. To always see the beauty in everything. To be kind to everyone because you never know what they're going through. But, I thought he was beautiful as he was. And it hurt my heart that he couldn't see himself through my eyes.

These are the things I thought about every day as we sat at lunch. The things I thought about when the cheerleaders and rude jocks made cruel jokes. "Who would ever kiss you?" "He looks like he went down on a lawn mower." And all the mocking laughs that went with it. Every time someone laughed in our direction, he would cover his scar with his hand. Whether or not he could hear what the joke was because somehow he knew that it was about him.

Looking back, there are times that I wish I had shared my own insecurities with him. So he'd know he wasn't alone. I never did until it was too late. But, I rationalized it by telling myself it's not the same. People couldn't see mine unless I wanted them to. He had to live everyday with his in full view of everyone. Nothing to hide behind.

But, I was scared that he would judge me for mine. Yes, he has his own. But, he didn't have my eyes or else he would see himself as beautiful too. So I blame myself for him transforming the way he did. Because maybe if he knew he wasn't alone...he wouldn't have cared so much to change. To fit in.

That's why I resigned myself to be the one to stop him before he was too far gone to bring back. Why I finally decided to join Cobra Kai.