Chapter 2: What We Have to Be is What We Are

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"Sir, we've got a case," Penelope said as she walked into Hotch's office.

He looked up, confused. "I haven't seen anything."

"I keep my own trackers running, I don't trust local police departments," she answered, handing him a folder. "Look over it, I think it's something worth checking out."

"You know we can't go anywhere without being invited," he accepted the folder.

"It's right here in Washington, Sir."

Shit.

"Thank you, Garcia, you're dismissed," he waved her off and opened the folder.

As Penelope exited the office, Morgan looked up. "Anything interesting, baby girl?"

She shrugged, "Possible case here in the city. Nothing for sure."

"If you think it's worth looking into, then it is," he smiled at her.

She didn't smile back. She hadn't since Spencer left, no matter how much the rest of the team tried; it was as if she'd become a different person. She walked back to her office quietly.

"Has anyone tried to talk to Spencer?" Morgan asked as the door closed. "For her sake, if nothing else."

JJ sighed. "I tried. Ever since you tried to kick the door in it's been even harder, I'm pretty sure he blocked our numbers."

"This isn't my fault," Morgan said immediately.

JJ snorted derisively, "You're not an angel here, Derek. You tried to break the poor boy's door down."

"And you didn't stop calling him for an entire day," he shot back.

"Both of you, stop it, now," Emily cut in. "Spencer made his own decision. We can't blame each other; we just have to move on."

No one wanted to do that. How could they?

***

"Okay, Garcia flagged a local case, so we're going to check it out," Hotch said as the team gathered in the briefing room. "Pen?"

She stood quietly, her lack of energy affecting the entire room. "Okay, so, I keep tabs on certain deaths, methodology similar to what we've seen in the past. Three different examples have popped up in the past week, all within a 20-mile radius of us."

"Possible obsessive stalker?" Emily asked.

Garcia shrugged, "I'm not sure yet. Sp-" She looked up to ask a question to the man who wasn't there. "Sorry. I- uh- I don't know."

The beginning of his name hung in the air, as much as they all tried to move past it.

"Dave, you and Prentiss go to the first scene; JJ and Morgan, you go to the second. I'll take the third." Without Spencer.

***

"They're going to figure it out, sooner or later," Maeve was back.

"No," Spencer laughed, "They won't."

"You can't be sure of that, Spence. You're putting yourself in danger. You're putting them in danger."

"Maybe they deserve to be in danger!" He snapped. "Maybe they deserve some of what I experienced. What we experienced."

"You can't mean that."

He growled with anger, hands running through his hair as he paced. "You can't tell me what I mean, Maeve. You're dead. You're gone, and they couldn't help me, and I wish you would just shut up and leave!"

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