The Bread Dildo

Chapter 2: Mansion

« Yes I am sassing you. What else would I be doing? » I said, rolling my eyes.

« You're gonna pay for that nuggie » he said before farting very loudly. I stared at him while he ran out of the room with diarrhea on the back of his pants.

Right after he left I started crying wondering why my mom left me for Pootooshka. How was Pootooshka so much better than I was? What did I do to deserve this? Pootooshka ruined my life and I will ruin theirs.

****
After contemplating my life decisions, I started wandering the mansion to look for my new sugar daddy. I looked in every room I came across. Right when I was about to start start sharting my pants, I found a door that was locked.

I looked through the little poop hole and saw him sitting on a bed solving puzzles. He looked so concentrated while trying to do them that i didn't want to interrupt.

But of course, it's me so obviously i did.

I knocked on the door, about to shart in my pants if bakery boy didn't open the door in two seconds flat. The door opened to reveal daddy there in all of his glory.

His eyes looked like he had been crying. I don't know why he was crying in the first place, I would have been proud if i had a shart as big as that one.

"What do you want now?" he asked me.

"I want to know how the hell you sharted that big. It was honestly the coolest thing i've ever heard." I answered him, hoping he would tell me his secret. And he did.

"Ya know my secret is....." he started.

***

"Before i forget to tell you completely, my name is louie." he-no louie said. (😜)

"Wow, that's such a teddy graham name and my names Harreh." I said cheerfully. (🦶)

He looked starstruck for a second before blurting out his ex boyfriends name was voldy moldy. Louie slammed the door shut in my face while I just looked at him like he was crazy.

It's illegal to date voldy moldy because he is the guardian of the galaxy. Well, along with cocomelon. After actually realizing loueh closed the closed the door in my face, I slowed sharted the way to my car.

***

When I finally got home, I ran upstairs to my bedroom and started looking for my karaoke machine. 'It's got to be here somewhere' I thought.

"Whatcha lookin for?" My sister, Gemma Lady Gaga Styles said from somewhere behind me.

I looked over, almost completely scared out of my gayness. Lady-I mean Gemma was covered in kitkat wrappers (not sponsored).

"You are absolutely ridiculous." I told her, before continuing to look for the karaoke machine, "and i'm looking for the karaoke machine. Do you know where it is?"

"I think i saw it the other day, Daniel wanted to use it for something." Of course, Daniel her boyfriend. (🙄) He is so goddamn annoying I swear. Never wanting to shut up and whatnot.

"Of course it was Daniel." I told her my obvious annoyance. She burst (💥) out a big wet willy (😋) before running outta the room.

'Oh well' I thought, I didn't really like her being in here anyways. Anyways, back to looking for the karaoke machine.

***

I spent an hour looking for the stupid karaoke machine. I finally found it in the kitchen under the sink. How it got there is not my concern. At least I found it. I decided to go outside and sing to my neighbours.

What a good neighbour I am.

'I really hope they like my singing' I thought before busting out boomerang by jojo siwa (our queer queen).

They threw shit at me through their doors and from their windows. I was a good boi and caught all of it in my mouth. (😋) I hope sugar daddy loueh is proud of me.

It was 2 in the morning so I decided to get an early night and headed to bed. The one dream I had that night was [inserting] the bread dildo inside of the sewers and taking a big bite out of it. I wanted to know how good it tasted.

A/n: long time no see hehehe 😳 sorry that i haven't updated this book in like three months so like oops about that cause i've been a bit busy. anyways, i hope you guys liked this chapter and continue on this poopy journey with me. love you guys 🌳🤑see y'all in another three months 🤩😃