I care about you

Bulletproof

warnings: mentions of blood, angst, character death

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A loud beep welcomed you when you opened your eyes. You had to take a moment to take in what just happened. What did just happen?

You were lying on the floor, the room you were in was a mess. There were more bodies lying on the floor around you. They were less lucky than you as they were all dead. There was blood next to you on the floor. Well.... there was blood everywhere you looked around you in the room. The event that had played out just a few moments ago returned to your mind. Javier had a lead on La Quica. You and a team of officers stormed the place, in the hope you would catch him.You weren't quite sure what this place was but it certainly was some sort of hide out.

A shockwave of pain went through your entire body.

Holy Shit!

It all came back to you. One of the men shooting at you hit you. The blood around you wasn't from the other bodies, it was yours. You didn't have the guts to look down at your aching wounded body. You try to add some pressure to the wound. You lead your hands to your stomach, smearing blood all over your hands. You could feel both of the wounds. The first hole just missed your heart while the second one might have hit your liver, you weren't quite sure but the wound was around that area. You could feel a third one somewhere on your stomach. Shit.

Why didn't you wear the damn vest?

You groaned in pain. The feeling was unbearable. You had to see how bad the wounds were. You swallowed heavily, took a deep breath and looked down at your stomach. You removed your hands that were covered in blood. The three bullet wounds were visible by the bloodstains on your shirt. You were losing a lot of blood, way too much blood. If this wouldn't kill you then what would?

A door opened. Voices came from the other room. They came closer. Barely awake you recognized the men that walked into the room. It was Javier and his team. You could hear him command the men to look around.

You tried to make some noise to make yourself visible.

"Here... I am here"

It came out way softer than intended. Your voice sounded like a whisper, a very painful one.

Javier who was looking around heard some sort of noises coming from the back of the room. He turned around the corner only to find you lying there in pain.

He rushed over to you dropping his gun. He put his hands on your stomach where the bullet wounds were. He looked at you pained at the sight of you. He looked at you as how you felt.

"Stay with me"

You just nodded your head as that was the only thing you could do.

He shouted something at the men surrounding the room. Your Spanish was horrible, for a DEA agent... in Colombia...

You heard the word ambulance being spoken out by him.

"Help is on the way" he said, looking back into your eyes. The hospital was half an hour away. Help wasn't going to be there in time.

As he looked down at you he noticed you weren't wearing your bulletproof vest.

"Where is your vest? Please don't tell me you forgot it"

Your eyes were welling up, mostly because of the pain and the fact that you were about to die. Your life was just getting together. You and Javier had been together for almost two years now. Everything was going so well that you moved in with him. That pained look hurt you even more than the wounds on your body.

"I was at home when you called me. I didn't think to go get the vest at the office. It was stupid...."

"Yes it was!" He was angry. Angry that you got yourself hurt. But he couldn't give you a hard time about it, not now. Not like this.

You hadn't noticed that there were tears running down your cheeks as Javier cupped your cheek wiping them away.

"It's okay. It's going to be alright"

It was a sweet sentiment. You hoped it would be alright. That the ambulance would be here in the next five minutes. But you knew that it wasn't going to happen.

Javier was so worried. He barely let you notice. He smiled at you softly, trying to give some sort of hope, to give himself hope. He wasn't going to give up on you. Not now. Not ever. He needed you by his side.

You were in so much pain that you started blacking out. Javier kept his eyes on you and noticed your eyes slowly close. He cupped your face with both hands now.

"Y/N, stay with me, please mi amor"

You opened your eyes. Your eyelids felt heavy. Your body weak. You wanted nothing more than to stay with him but you didn't have much strength inside of you to keep fighting for your life.

"Javi, I.... it.... I can't...." you couldn't get the sentence out properly. "It's too late..... you know it is"

"No, don't say that." Javier dropped his head. Tears filled his eyes. he Let one of his hands that was cupping your face drop to the floor. Forming a fist with it. He could punch a whole through the ground beneath him. He wasn't ready to give up on you just yet. he couldn't imagine his life without you. You had to stay awake.

"Javi, look at me"

It took Javier a moment to decide to look up. He really hasn't given up on you but this part of him knew that he would regret it if this was truly the last time he could look into your beautiful brown eyes. You noticed the tears that filled his eyes.

"I want you to do something for me...." Javier nodded. Trying to keep the tears from running down his face.

"I want you to get that son of a bitch. Get him and make him pay for what he did."

Javier sighed. His heart was aching. Both of his hands reached up again to cup your face.

"We can make him pay together."

You smiled "Perhaps... but if I don't make it.... You have to do it alone, with Steve's help. Do that for me, please?"

Javier nodded. He tilted his head reaching up to yours pressing a kiss on to your head

"Te amo"

You took all the strength you still had in you to lift up your arm. Reaching for his hand. He let go of your face and took your hand, entangeling his fingers into yours. He squeezed it.

"I love you too"

Javier closed his eyes, pressing his head against yours. Your eyes were filled with tears. You could feel the life inside of you fade away. Your eyelids were heavy, they slowly started to close. A tear left your eye and fell down your cheek as they closed. At that same time you breathed your last breath.

The hand that was holding Javier lost it's grip.

"Y/N?" Javier pulled away to check up on you.

You were gone.

His tears escaped his eyes.

The sirens of the ambulance got closer. Javier couldn't believe it. He stood up, angered by the fact that if they would've gotten here earlier you might've still be alive.

He kicked the nearest object he could find.

The most tragic thing about all of this is that he never got to make Escobar pay, at least not himself, and it will haunt him forever. He would carry that pain with him forever. You were never lost. He carried you with him. Any thing he did, any decision he made, you were there, in his heart.