First Impressions: A Modern Pride and Prejudice Adaptation

Chapter 19.1

The house lights lifted and Darcy stretched his arms. He paused when his shoulder cracked. It didn't hurt—the movement actually felt good—but he scowled and gingerly lowered the arm anyway, resting his hand on his leg. He had to force his fingers into stillness, to keep them from twitching and jittering. He shifted his weight.

The feeling of discontent had followed him, waiting until moments of calm to pounce. It was all right while he was moving, driving between cities and wandering New York with Georgie and Robert. But now that he was stationary in Hunsford, it was back. Pulling one leg back, he pushed himself forward and stood. He would have left without comment, but Robert, Anne, and Aunt Catherine all turned to look at him almost simultaneously; the eyes unnerved him. "I... I was just... I don't know, I just want to walk somewhere."

Both Anne and Robert noted the hesitation in his voice. Robert followed him up. "I'll go with you."

Darcy nodded sharply and took a step, starting to move away.

Anne lowered her head slightly, crossing her hands in her lap. "I would... come with you too, but I might slow you down."

Immediately, Robert assured, "No, don't worry about it. You should come if you want to."

She smiled and began to push herself to her feet, adjusting the crutches as she went. With Robert standing and waiting in front of Darcy, Darcy found himself trapped in the aisle. After a moment of waiting for Anne to finish fiddling with her crutches, he found himself tapping his foot and immediately forced himself to stop. There was no reason for his impatience. He bowed his head and waited to follow Robert out of the aisle.

Aunt Catherine fanned herself with her program. "Are you going to the lobby for refreshments? I will meet you there shortly," she said without waiting for an answer. Darcy merely dipped his head in acknowledgement. Anne finally situated herself with her crutches, so he didn't bother to answer verbally. They moved out of the row and into the hallway beside the auditorium in single file, Robert at the front, Anne at the back, and Darcy sandwiched between them.

They hadn't gone far, just out of earshot of Aunt Catherine, before Anne frowned and prodded Darcy in the back. "What's wrong with you, Fitz? You're so out of it," she complained. Robert stopped himself from sighing aloud but, as his back was to his cousins, he allowed himself to roll his eyes. Something being "wrong" with Darcy was not exactly out of the ordinary. But even over the past few days his cousin had seemed especially out-of-sorts and he was curious what sort of response they would get. He walked towards an alcove by a window where they could speak in relative privacy.

"Um..." Darcy didn't know how to explain himself. He clenched his jaw while he thought. When Robert stopped to lean his back against the corner of wall, Darcy walked right up to the window. The winter sun had already set and the snow outside was illuminated only by the gentle orange glow of streetlights.

I've been struggling to focus on my writing, I'm worried about my sister, my best friend hates his job, and even though it brings us geographically closer than we have been in years I've only seen him three times in six months... and I've been pining for a girl I saw last in July. He didn't think he could tell them any of those things for a number of reasons—beginning with the fact that they saw each other less than twice a year and ending with the fact that he found the entirety of the list to be absurd, or at least a little melodramatic. So, lied. Or at least stretched the truth a little. "I've been... trying to decide if I should apply to the Iowa Writer's Workshop or not." It was one of the things that had been bothering him.

"Trying to decide?" Anne squeaked.

"It's a really big decision." He braced his forearms against the windowsill.