"Get off me," San growls, pulling his shoulder out of Hongjoong's grip.
"San-ah, relax. It's not that big of a deal," Hongjoong responds.
The look of frustration on San's face is clear, anger mixing with it as he tries to move away from Hongjoong.
"So many things went wrong with the performance tonight, and you're just going to say it's not a big deal?" San huffs, continuing to go over the problems of the performance in his head.
He's a perfectionist and holds himself to extremely high standards, but this is what he does: he performs. If he can't do that right, then what's the point, right?
Hongjoong watches as San stomps out from under the stage to the van outside, catching Wooyoung's eye, who is standing in the corner watching this all unfold.
"I'll talk to him," Wooyoung says, eliciting a nod from Hongjoong.
Wooyoung knows how San can get frustrated and hooked on things that go wrong during performances, and he's impossible to talk to when he gets like that. The members rely on Wooyoung getting San back in the same mindset, in hopes that he can somehow get through to San.
Wooyoung follows San out to the van, the others filing into the other van provided so the two are alone beside the driver.
Wooyoung slides past San and sits in the seat next to him. The van is filled with a moment of silence as Wooyoung tries to read San: he's frowning, his face rests against his fist as he leans against the arm of the seat and looks out the window, quietly muttering to himself.
"San-ah," Wooyoung starts, but San cuts him off.
"I don't want to talk about it," San growls. "All everybody wants to do is talk. We spend all of these hours rehearsing for what? Just to have a performance filled with mistakes?" His voice begins to rise in volume, though he's not quite yelling yet. "There's no reason I should have missed my mark that many times, or get the footwork backward. This is what we've dedicated our lives to, and I can't even get through a simple performance without mistakes?"
Wooyoung stays silent for a moment, trying to figure out the best way to comfort San. This isn't the first time he's seen him like this, but it's always hard to get through to him at the beginning without having him totally shut down.
Instead, Wooyoung doesn't say anything, reaching to touch San's arm in an attempt to comfort and calm him down. The reaction he gets is one that shocks him.
San whips his head from staring out the window—the van now moving as the world around them zips by as they head towards the hotel—locking eyes with Wooyoung as he grabs his wrist tightly and pulls it from his arm. There's a pause for a moment, it's short but it's there, and there's something that changes. San remains holding Wooyoung's wrist tightly, but there's something in his eyes that change, though Wooyoung can't quite pinpoint what it is.
"Sorry," San mumbles, releasing Wooyoung and turning his back to him.
Wooyoung stares at him, shock stopping him from saying anything else as he registers what just happened. He watches San, still frustrated, but not as much as a moment before.
"You don't have to keep it all locked inside you," Wooyoung says quietly, rubbing the wrist San roughly grabbed.
San has been extremely frustrated and dissatisfied with his performances lately, causing him to close up and shut people out, and Wooyoung has missed being with him. It was usually hard keeping their relationship a secret from fans and during interviews, but lately, it's been as if they aren't even together at all. It hurts Wooyoung to see San be so hard on himself, but it also hurts that he's been put on the back burner because San gets so stuck in his head.
