fucking mess

5 2 0
                                    

my mind is dirty place
full of thoughts
and dull empty
at the same time

don't know how to make it clear
to see what's right on front of me
to find out what's it that I really want
to make up my mind

I wanna have control
someone please tell me
how to make it happen
how to become sane

I feel like I'm paralyzed
but I'm not afraid
even tho that's my greatest fear
I'm enjoying that feeling

I don't understand myself
am I being weird
is it mean hoping
have I become selfish

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