Pull You Back Up From Your Darkest Low

A/N Suwp guys! There's a lot of things the 2k12 series blows over in the farmhouse arc including some of their feelings and emotions, so I decided to create some I imagine Donatello having. Hope you enjoy! And feel free to leave comments or whatevas! They're truly addicting and give me the motivation to continue writing! If you don't, that's cool too! I don't really care! (ツ)

I don't own TMNT sadly, if I did, you better believe I'd make a season six! Hint, hint Nickelodeon! XD just kidding! But not.

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The barn was dark except for a small lightbulb that illuminated the area in a soft gentle glow. It wasn't much, but it provided just enough light to help Donatello see what he was working with.

This had to work. It just had to.

With careful, collected fingers, the intellectually inclined turtle lifted a dropper to a small beaker that was currently housing mutagen, and gently squeezed the bulb to release a few drops of codeine onto the sparkling green ooze. The chemicals landed on the mutagen with a small splash before it began to fizzle and produce a strange smell that it was not supposed to originate. And right when the mutagen began to glow an ominous purple color, Donatello backed away just before the contents in his beaker exploded with a puff of smoke that made him cough harshly.

He waved his hand to clear the air of the putrid-smelling smoke before sagging heavily against his task chair to stare up at the barn ceiling. It didn't work. He needed it to work and still, it didn't. He wasn't sure where he went wrong. He thought he had done everything correctly according to the chemical formula. He added Meperidine just like he was supposed to, but perhaps he added too much, so when it combined with the codeine and the mutagen, it created an explosive effect, thus ruining another section of mutagen that could not be rescued. If he kept this up (creating mutagen that disintegrated or couldn't be salvaged) he'd run out of mutagen and fast. And if that happened, he wouldn't be able to create a mutagenic medicine to help heal all the injuries Leo had obtained from his last encounter with the Shredder.

Donnie pushed the heels of his hands against his exhausted, burning eyes and withheld a groan that wanted to escape his lips. It was his fault Leo was stuck in a coma with no sign of waking up. It was his fault their father was gone -most likely dead- because he didn't listen to Leonardo when the oldest said they should leave the city before the invasion started. This was all his fault and he had no clue where to begin to start fixing his mistakes. The only idea he had was to create a mutagenic medicine to help cure Leo and help him recover faster, but all his attempts to create said medicine ended up rejected and tossed with the rest of the discarded batches of mutagen that couldn't be saved or salvaged.

Don rubbed his palm against his eyes before dropping them to his lap and turning his gaze to stare at all his failed attempts. Why didn't he listen to Leo when his older brother told them to flee the city? They would have been okay if Donnie had just listened to Leonardo.

The purple-banded brother gently turned his chair away from his makeshift lab to stare through the darkness at the lumps and objects that hid in the shadows of the barn. If he didn't get away from this environment, the guilt was going to eat him up alive and keep him from making any more progress. So with a small moan, he got to his feet before taking slow strides to the barn doors to get some fresh air and maybe travel to the farmhouse to fix himself up some more coffee. Coffee would do him a world of good right now and perhaps be the key to make his mutagenic medicine succeed.

Donatello stepped outside and took a deep breath of cold night air and tried to calm his nerves and frustrations. Just a quick break then he'll try once more. And hopefully this time he'll be triumphant and create something to help fix his brother and the one hundred and one problems he created for his family and friends.