written right after i rewatched grey's anatomy season 11 episode 21 :')
heavily inspired by meredith grey and derek sheperd bc i'm so fucking emotional right now
this'll be short ish
warning: sad ig. will contain way too many grey's quotes and references don't fight me I AM A WRECK RN
you can play the song above while reading this. actually you should. i don't care if you don't want to and if it stops in the middle play it again
▬▬▬▬▬ VOICEMAILS ▬▬▬▬▬
"if only love was enough to keep you alive"
#1: i told you we'd be okay
lauren: hey jaeden, it's me. it's been a few days since your funeral. i still miss you, lexie and derek miss you. things aren't the same. i mean of course they aren't.
the bed feel so empty, it's like i've forgotten what it's like to sleep alone. you were supposed to be home with us, you and i literally just made up and you get into this accident how is that fair?
i told you that we'd be okay, but are we really? i don't think i can do this without you jae. why do bad things happen to good people? you're supposed to be here, you're supposed to be with your family, and you're not and i just - i can't - i can't do this jaeden not without you.
i don't think i'm going to be okay. i don't think i can do this.
how am i supposed to go on with life without you? how do you expect me to be okay when i just stood by the dying body of the love of my life? letting go is easy, it's the moving on that's painful. jaeden i don't want to move on. i just can't.
#2: the things we said
lauren: they say death is hardest on the living.
i know you're looking down at us, i know you're mad that i took the kids and left
surprise?
i'm sorry jaeden, i said i was going to be strong but everywhere i looked in that house all i could think about was you.
how can i not? it's the house you built for us. technically i constructed it seven years ago with candles. remember when i did that corny thing?
i said, i believe that we could be extraordinary together rather than ordinary apart. can you please just come back and tell me this was all a dream?
jaeden i'd do anything to be extraordinary with you again.
you told me that i was like a breath of fresh air. that you were drowning and that i saved you, jaeden please just - save me. save us, wake me up from this terrible nightmare.
be my breath of fresh air because i really need it right now.
i told you i could live without you. but i don't want to, and i still don't want to live without you. you can't just leave after i tell you that i don't want to live without you. how is that fair?
