Safe and Sleep

Prologue

"Holy heck."

That was my first reaction when I somehow felt like I can't sleep. It was so late that I was worried if I will wake up late because tomorrow I still have school activities. Though it turns out I didn't sleep the entire night.

I remember that my first thought was, "Did i develop an Insomnia?"

But I was unsure. Self diagnosing isn't good right? Many people have told me that already, mostly through social media. So i thought it was probably just my sleep schedule being messy. I'm not gonna lie, my sleep schedule is indeed messy. However there are times that I almost didn't sleep for two days straight.

"Is this really Insomnia?"

There are several assumptions made by me here and there. But in the end, I couldn't confirm anything. I feel like there isn't any comfortable place for me to sleep, or rather a safe place. Of  course the safest place to sleep is on my bed, where else? But I feel like even my bed is not safe anymore. I feel threatened, but by what? Until now, I couldn't find an answer.

"Should I just kill myself?"

Oh yeah, there was a time that it was so severe that I ended up thinking ending my own life. But then I feel like not doing it because I don't have the energy and I still have things I like to do. At this point, I don't care to think or make anymore assumptions. I just want this to end. I just want to sleep.

I wonder if this hell would end.