A New Dream...?

Chapter 2

"I'm not perfectly content where I am."

Ruddiger lifts his head lazily from where it had been resting on his boy's lap. His eyes sharpen in concern when he sees the seriousness in Varian's.

Varian sighs, watching his friend's now worried expression. He shifts against the rough bark of the large oak tree he has found himself coming to more and more often. In a way, he figures it reminds him of the apple orchards back home. Back when he was just the village leader's son, when his only goals in life were to experiment for the sake of experimenting, he might end up resting or even falling asleep under a tree, sometimes to wake up to his father carrying him home. Even after getting out of prison, when the villagers' stares followed him everywhere and their whispers were too loud in his ears, he and Ruddiger could always find peace in the orchard.

For now, though, he has to make do with the palace gardens. Home would be nice, but he's not scheduled to leave the palace for a couple more days. He really should be working on his newest project, but his mind had become filled with too many confusing thoughts and he just had to get out. Of course, Ruddiger had followed. He always follows his child, something that never ceases to amaze him.

And now he continues to observe Varian, worry increasing every second he doesn't go on. The teen groans, finally breaking the tension by looking away.

"I know, it's stupid," he admits. "I mean, look at all this!"
He pauses to gesture at the luscious greenery they currently sit amidst, then to the beautiful skyline of the capital city, and finally down at his own very expensive, very royal clothes. Ruddiger chitters as Varian shakes his head, almost as if in disbelief.

"After everything that happened. Everything I did..." he trails off. "Huh. Who would've thought?"

Varian pushes himself up off the ground and away from the tree, carefully brushing dirt off his fairly new outfit. Ruddiger scurries to climb up the boy's body, settling in his usual spot around his shoulders.

"This is awesome!" he continues to rant, pacing past flowers and bushes that create a small path. "I love my job, Rapunzel and Eugene are great, Dad is safe the kingdomissafeI'm-"

Ruddiger's squeak makes Varian stop his words and his steps. The teen had sped up his words to an incoherent rate, a signal that he's nervous, and hiding what he really wants to say.

At the sight of his friend's knowing look, Varian lets out a heavy sigh for the second time, gently pulling the raccoon off his shoulders and holding him in front of his face.

"Ok, you got me," he says with a fond grin. It quickly changes to seriousness again. "It's just, none of it feels real, you know? I don't deserve it and...well, what if I mess up again? I don't know about all this, Ruddiger..."

His eyes had drifted down in his confession, but now he looks up through his long bangs to see the critter's reaction. He's mildly surprised to see a tilted head, slightly narrowed eyes, and paws on hips. It only takes a moment for his shock to turn to understanding, though, and his eyebrows furrow in annoyance.

"Oh no, no, no, no," he starts, placing the raccoon on the ground and pointing a finger down at him. "No, we are not talking about this again. That's not what this is about. Did you not just hear me? I can barely believe this is happening, I'm not gonna throw it all away!"

Varian resumes his walking as Ruddiger skillfully laces through his legs, chittering incessantly.

"Look, I get what you're trying to say. Everyone's been telling me the same thing, but come on. Just because I'm growing up does not mean I have to go 'find my destiny' or whatever. I'm fine where I'm at!"

He glances down at Ruddiger in time to see him roll his eyes. A squeak follows.

"Ok but - ugh, yeah. I know, I did just say that I wasn't content." Varian throws his hands in the air dramatically. "Sor-ry. Maybe I was just trying to vent to my friend? And anyways, that's just how I feel. I'm not gonna do anything about it."

He stops as he comes to the garden's exit. As Ruddiger catches up, he subconsciously fiddles with the edge of his glove, revealing bare skin underneath. The only thing interrupting the pale surface of his wrist is a collection of barely visible, small scars. His eyes trail down each of them, memories of cuffs and chains persistently clinging to him. He lets out a deep breath, long ago having learned to suppress the shudder that comes with such memories. His hands drop behind his back.

"I'm not screwing this up. Not again."

"Varian of Old Corona!"

The sudden voice causes Varian to abruptly spin around, almost losing his balance in the process. Ruddiger scampers up his owner's back, curling around his neck and draping his bushy tail down his chest. They both look at whoever has addressed the Royal Engineer.

Nigel, advisor to the Queen, overseer of all Kingdom business, and Varian's supervising officer, looks down at him. It takes Varian a second to realize he's waiting for a response. He clears his throat.

"Oh...hey, Nigel," he greets sheepishly, a blush coming to his cheeks as he remembers the man must've heard him ranting to Ruddiger. "I was just - just taking a walk. Getting some fresh air, you know? These gardens are so...pretty..."

The advisor's expression doesn't change, and his eyebrows stay drawn together.

"Hm," he hums in the monotone, almost bored tone he always uses with the alchemist. "Well, I don't have to remind you that your newest project presentation is in two days."

Varian's nervous smile drops at the reminder, and he instinctively reaches to scratch Ruddiger's head.

"Right...no, I - I didn't forget."

"Good," Nigel replies. "The kingdom is trusting you. And the Queen expects perfection."

Varian nods. (He knows Rapunzel expects no such thing, but he feels right now is not the best time to argue with his boss.)

With a small shake of his head and a barely hidden, exasperated sigh, he eventually walks past the teen and into the palace.

Varian's eyes linger on the big doorway for a second before they eventually drift back to the city overview. He really should get back to work, but he stays a little longer, not able to tear his gaze away. He watches as the sun hangs high above the very distant walls, and he can't help but wonder...

"No," he states, turning away and towards the castle entrance as Ruddiger swishes his tail at the movement. "I got my dream.

I'm not gonna risk finding a new one."

~

Floors beneath anything royal or important, guards pace the palace dungeons. As usual, they gossip of the latest news from upstairs. The new Royal Engineer - a boy - and his latest project to be revealed in a couple days.

And as usual, the prisoners ignore them.

That is, all except one.

In the dampest, darkest cell sits a man, long, unkept hair hanging over his listening ears, sharp, watching eyes peering intently. At last, the guards walk out of his hearing range. He leans back, unfazed.

Then, slowly, Andrew smiles.

"Interesting..."