Faded Alive

prologue.

Present.

...

Air rhymes enormously, making the sea beneath the bridge swash against the shore with no lyrics. The universe felt loss and the earth felt empty, with the bridge sensing my sorrowful presence denying any passenger above it.

Buzz... Buzz..

My phone vibrated in my jeans pocket. "Hello?" I answered.

I walked down the bridge where I packed my car and hopped in it, and 20 minutes drive, I arrived at the house front door. I swallowed hard, my nippy hands feeling numb and I knocked with a trembling hand as I waited but no one answered, just as I was about leaving, the door swung open.

"Hello, good morning", I greeted.

She forced her littlest smile, "come in". She said and I followed to the cozy living room. I sat on the chair in her open spaced kitchen. "Have you had your breakfast?"

"No ma'am". I said truthfully. She silently made a coffee and handed me the cup "thank you" I said sipping. My eyes found it hard to meet her eyes and I kept the cup, tracing my hand on the tip. The cup was labeled 'Travel the world' and I wondered how ironically my long gone dream was to 'Travel the world'.

The clichéd mindset of beings, that you can trail every bit of the earth like; 'Hey buddy, lets walk around the world.. or orb'. Because we're miraculously just pack of beings in an orb called Earth and unpredictably predicting what's outside when all we see is space.

"What do you want to be?".

I looked up from my seat to the window, gazing the white cotton_like stuff floating just above our reach. A Paint of blue and white changing in themes with the same art (Nature).

"I want to be...". I turned slowly to the board looking at the arrays of globes, astronaut diagram, and laboratory specimens that clearly described a science class.

I tried again, "I want to be... A basketball player".

And shuffles follows, before the educator plastered a pretend beam on her face. "That's.. That's a great dream Jamal".

In life we mostly mistook some nightmares to dreams and vice versa, but dreams are perhaps dreams in descriptions but dreams in reality, where your eyes blinks and your nostrils releases gaseous, surely will change in meaning.

We stayed in silence, coffee decreasing, filling my stomach with caffeine and jolting my mind back to reality as she stood towards one of her locker and took a book (a huge journal), she looked at the book for some moments and gestured it to me.

"Here! she said I should give it to you". She handed me the journal and I looked down at it for some minutes. I stood to relieve from the awkward silence.

"Thank you", I whispered "thank you so much". I thanked her and walked towards the door, trying to hide my trembling body. She bade me goodbye and I hopped into the car and sped off to my condo.

I unlocked the door to my cozy room, dropped the key on the locker whilst I hanged my winter jacket and walked to my study. I dropped the journal on the table, finding the courage to open it, but I did.

*****

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Kherdeeniasse.