Tortured Love - Bucky Barnes

CHAPTER TWO

Slouching against the newly glossed door frame, all eyes met mine. I only noticed one pair, those blue eyes. I felt suffocated. Like i was drowning underneath the wave of his ocean blue eyes. I felt a hole burn within me. I couldn't tell whether it was the pain of missing him, hating him or just his death stare. If anything it was painful and it was killing me.

"I'm being talked about" i smiled at everyone in the room. A bittersweet smile. Still his eyes payed upon me. I felt a heat to my cheeks rising. My mouth became dry while thoughts about him went wild. Still james buchanan barnes was a godsend. Beauty was never his downfall.

"Loralei this is Sam, Bucky and Zemo" Sharon smiled at me. Tilting my head to the side, i thought for a second. Why are they here? Haven't they not got "hero duties" to be doing?

"I know them" looking at either of the men, i rested my gaze upon Bucky "some i know better than others" I smirked as i seen him shake his head before taking a swig of what Sharon had gave him.

"We need your help" Sam stated and looked towards me pleadingly.

I couldn't hold my laugh. After all these years, all the years of running and never being good enough. Never been accepted to their society. They needed my help. The "hero's" felt failed so they turned to the villains. I turned to walk out, did they honestly think i would jump to their commands?

"Loralei! just maybe give them a chance. sam will clear our names and we can return... life will be better" Sharon looked at me with hope in her eyes. hope that shattered me. She really needed this. I know how much it kills her everyday being away from her family. If it meant she could be happy i would do anything!

"Fine! let's get one thing straight. I will give you all a chance. Don't break or ruin that chance. I've had promises broken to me before." I stared at Bucky, tension was building between us. "I know some of you who can't keep them"

Everyone's eyes turned to Bucky sat silent on the sofa. I smirked once again. It felt so good to have some authority. Dominance over him, for now.

Sharon, Sam and Bucky began talking. Catching up. I had none of that to do. I just needed a drink. I couldn't tell if i was more thirsty for the soldier on my sofa or if i just was dehydrated. Wandering to the drinks cart we owned with some of the most fine wine, a young man hovered near.

"Your coat looks nice. What's it made out of? Boyfriend material?" I laughed at my own witty ness, he however stayed neutral. A small smile faulted on his face still.

"No, it's wool and viscose lining." He spoke so seriously. "Boyfriend material sounds cheap" watching my every move, i poured my drink then turned to ask another question. Determined to break his serious facade.

"What's your name then. Is it mr. rich guy?" I smiled at him. Finally we had a breakthrough, he smiled back at me shaking his head lightly. I heard a small laugh come from him before he leaned in and whispered.

"I'm zemo but Bucky and Sam call me sugar daddy" Zemo then lightly laughed. I choked on my drink, letting out a loud laugh. I couldn't handle it. Where did they find Zemo. He really is a comedic treasure.

"What are you two lovebirds laughing at?" Sam nodded towards us. I still couldn't stop laughing, i believe it's the first time in years, i have laughed this much. I suddenly stopped when Bucky glared at me. Why did he still have this control over me?

"Sam, don't call them lovebirds." Bucky blatantly told Sam. The room deepened with tension. You could cut the atmosphere with a knife. I grabbed a lollipop out of the complimentary bowl. Placing it in my mouth, I slowly walked to bucky.

"Awh- are you mad James? feeling tense? angry?" I pouted my lip before making my way out of the room. Loud footsteps came from behind me, i stopped in my tracks. Dropping to the ground.

~ Hydra Base, 1947 ~

Breathing heavily i clasped my hand to my mouth, hoping to drown out the noise. Tears dropped from my cheeks to the floor, my eyes scrunched tight. These tears were painful. I peered around the corner, thankfully he wasn't there.

Running down the empty corridor, my heart reflected the silence i found myself in. It mourned the loss that i was going through. Struggling to heal from the betrayal of the one person i loved.

Memories burned turning to worthless ash as it went up in flames. Sorrow, anger and fear being the fuel. Yet i couldn't stop running. I had to keep going, leave everything behind while i had the chance. I felt broken.

Coming to a stand still, i let out a sigh. I was both physically and emotionally exhausted. Heavy footsteps sounded from behind me but i had no energy to run. What if i just gave up the fight. Gave up on everything. Numbing myself to everything i felt i turned around.

A metal arm held my throat, lifting me from the ground. My feet swung in the air as he held me in the air. My lungs burned, begging for air. As my throat closed and my mind fogged up, the last thing i seen was his electric blue eyes sparking some life into me. With my last breath i whispered "i love you James".

Suddenly i dropped to the ground.

~ Present ~

I let out a scream as i collided with the ground, curling in a ball. I breathed heavily trying to calm myself down. Struggling to connect what's reality and what's not. After a moment i was able to breathe again at a steady rhythm.

I felt a had caressing my back, soothing me. Looking up bucky sat looking at me. Lifting me up he hesitated before pulling me close. Smelling the strong cologne he wore relaxed me. His head rested upon mine as he held me.

Silently we sat in the corridor, nothing but our breathing broke the silence every once in a while. We said nothing. There was nothing to say. My head rested upon his chest, i listed to his heartbeat. Sometimes i forget he ever had a heart from what happened that night. I was left to run by myself. By the time i made it out there was no point in turning back, he was too far gone.

Bucky became the winter soldier that night. I was meant to be his first victim.