Please Read, it's important. (TBDL)

I'm alone, and can't be me.

I have another important message, but it is not a fun one. Since it exceeded the word limit I posted it as a book, and the link should be shared in my discussion wall. I just want to warn you guys that production on the books is continuing, but slowly. Right as I thought I was doing great in the TBDL community, my mental issues attacked me, and long story short, It's difficult not being able to directly talk to people about who I am. It hurts hiding such a big part of me, and only being able to express through books. I still enjoy making books, but I don't want that to be my only way to speak to people about my personality. This isn't some desperate ploy for attention, you don't even have to message me. I'd just like to let everyone know my current state, and the difficulties. Example, I like this girl at school. Sadly, as most normal teens, she most likely isn't into diapers. Kids and Teens, and, quite frankly, most adults, are immature about other people's opinions, and think that whatever they think something is, that's what'll be. May sound complicated, but for example, some entitled Teen thinks: Oh, this brand of food is cheaper, so it tastes worse. In their head, they believe that as fact, when in reality the cheaper food could be 10x better. I hardly have any friends IRL, and even those I don't feel comfortable sharing secrets with. I also have a lot of siblings, and I mean a decent amount. That means I can only be myself either WAY into the night, or, very rarely, in the bathroom while everyone else is doing their own things. I won't say my family is a bad one, because they aren't, u just feel they dont understand me. And not just the little me, the actual me. I function different then most of my siblings. I am the easiest to please (Like if the family is moving, I'm the only child who doesn't put up a fight), I generally do my chores quickly upon being asked, and I work my hardest on school. But with all those responsibilities, who has time to be little? I don't even have anything but diapers now, anyway. And at that rate, I yell at myself false claims like "Boys can't be ABDL or TBDL, it looks cringe, and nobody will date you." But, even though they are fake, it feels real. I've waited a total of seven years now, and have to wait another FOUR to be able to buy my own things. It sucks. I don't know how to handle who I am anymore, I feel like I'm a burden or some sort of mistake. I use diapers often, and when I do, it feels like all my burdens are gone. But, the second the time is up, I immediately change back to previous headspace as if I hadn't just worn a diaper. I don't trust my family with the information of me being TBDL. My parents are really overprotective. I got a lock on my phone once, that controlled everything I did, locked at 9PM (meaning I couldn't do anything on my phone past nine), and could track and ban apps and the things I do in them. They had put that lock on in September 2020, and it was all because I used the app Discord. DISCORD. I get creeps are out there, but I was in a small peaceful Roblox gaming group, god damnit! But anyway, I got the lock removed just two days ago. The only way I would write stories was to go on the family computer when my parents were gone and use an incognito browser. It worked to get the stories out there, but it took a chunk of the joy away. I enjoy making stories as I lay in bed and come up with great ideas, not sneaking into the computer frantically making sure they didn't come home yet. I also had wet the bed once, as I had gotten an injury (I don't know what happened, but I wet the bed two nights in a row, but it healed up.) During those two nights, my parents threatened that if it happened again I'd be getting surgery, so I tried to do all I could to get it to stop and, thankfully, it did.

Imagine telling them I LIKED to wear diapers. I would be in so much trouble, to the point that no matter how much joy I got from wearing, the amount of trouble I'd be in would destroy the comfort. In fact, I have a screen lock, only openable by my fingerprint just to unlock my phone, then I have a separate APP lock for Wattpad.

Another thing that annoys me is that people assume I'm gay. I'm short, roughly 5"3 or so. I'm nerdy and into things like Pokémon, 3DS hacking, etc. I don't know why, but appearantly that is worthy of being called gay for. I'm not hating on gays, I support LGBTQ+, but imagine someone assuming your sexuality, which is supposed to be a major thing that you decide yourself. I'm straight, and not into guys at all. That doesn't mean I hate people who are, I'm respectful of people's choice, and happy they are comfortable with who they are. But, nobody seems to return that favor. People always take what I do for them for granted. Why? I don't know. It hurts, though. People don't see that. They see what they want too, and that's it.

Long story short, or TL/DR: I can't be myself (little or actual) and I feel alone as I can't discuss things to people with similar interests. People call me rude names and my family is a bit intrusive.

Just, take this as a warning that words matter, and please be respectful of my late chapter uploads. Thank you for reading this announcement.