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Jun was by his door when he came back to the motel. She leaned against it, looking down at her feet.
Marcus halted.
"Where were you?" she asked, cocking her head at the bag behind his back.
"Went on a walk." Marcus did not bother to sound truthful.
Jun nodded. The girl didn't bother to look convinced. "You went the wrong way." she said after a moment. "The airport is North from here."
"There wasn't a right way to go. I just wanted to walk." His expression was daring, irritated even. As if he was annoyed anyone would question him.
Jun stopped to ponder. She stood in the center of a brittle bridge. If she took one heavy step, the wood under her feed would give out; If she did nothing, there was a chance the wind would topple the whole thing over. She didn't know if that chance was worth taking.
"Marcus," She began, measuring how light her first step would have to be. In front of her, Marcus braced himself.
He'd noticed Jun's lingering glances for the past two days. He avoided them the best he could, but he knew this moment would come sooner rather than later. For the short time they got to know each other, she had made it very clear she was not one to let go.
All he could do now was brace, and hope he'd grown up to be a competent liar.
"Something is bothering you." she left no room for ambiguity. "If you want to leave, I won't stop you."
There was an uneasiness in her words, despite her efforts to conceal it. Jun pushed forward, leaving behind the sour taste in her tongue. "I understand why you would want to. Our plans were more comfortable when all they were was theory."
She spoke so softly, he listened. Marcus imagined she would have done a better job than him back on the roof if the roles were reversed. Anyone could've, to be fair.
"But I think this isn't just about that." She flinched slightly, bracing for an impact of her own. "Can you tell me what is going on?"
His brows shot up at that. The boy wasn't used to people understanding how to ask without demanding. The shock alone made any coherent phrase unreachable. "Not right now." Was what he managed to push out.
Perhaps, that was the one answer Jun did not expect him to say. She accepted it, nonetheless, grateful for having received an answer at all.
"Okay. That's okay." She repeated as if to reassure herself. "I'll leave you alone, but at least let me give you these."
Jun grabbed his hand and placed a small container in it.
"It will help you sleep." She explained. "Those you've been taking don't work, I'm sure you've realized."
That was the final catalyst. Marcus was now the one on the brittle bridge. A hurricane of too many conflicting thoughts and unanswered questions threatened to wreck his ground. One more confusing action of hers, and he was doomed.
"Good night, Marcus." She said, before turning her back and honoring her promise to leave him.
Though, alone was not something he wished to be. Loneliness allowed his mind an unwelcomed freedom at that time. But he went inside and closed his door, anyway.
Marcus stared at the bottle for a long time, rolling it around in his palm, hearing the pills rattle inside.
He didn't tell anyone about his troubles at night, and yet she knew. He couldn't possibly imagine how. Funnily enough, it made sense. Within the mountains of adjectives he'd heard be used to describe Jun, inexplicable was the one that stuck the most. Even after she shared her story with them, Marcus could not pinpoint what she was made of.
Loyal, sure. Troubled, without a doubt. Strange, inexplicable, extraordinary.
Yes, he concluded, Jun was all of those.
Fuck. Sleep deprivation had made him deranged. He better take those pills before his mind went further than this.
He opened the lid and took a look inside. There were five. One of them was halved. Another intrusive deduction pushed its way to the front of his brain. Jun hadn't bought these for him. She knew the pills worked because she'd been taking them herself.
Marcus closed his eyes. Of course she would. What were his traumas compared to hers? What he had seen in the Omoiyari household was only a glimpse into the life that Jun lived.
He'd done it again. The selfishness he carried like a weight on his ankles had been in him for so long, he no longer felt its presence. How could he forget this isn't about him at all? Jun was the one in pain, Jun was the one trying to make things right. Jun deserved to be cared for, not him.
So, in a burst of conviction, he ran.
"Are you alright?" Jun asked after opening her door to a crazed, disheveled boy.
"I'm not leaving. I don't want to leave." He said, breathing out of control. "I want to see our plan through to the end. Fuck whoever tries to stop us."
A/N: hey guys I just wanted to thank all of you for the love you've been giving this book it's insane. And also, all the names of the reading lists you put Obedience in have entertained me so much. I've been laughing at "daddy riddle" and "daddy put a gun to my head" forever I swear.
