Well, Accidents Do Happen

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Roxanna:

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[30 minutes earlier...]

I have a bad feeling. Rodrick has been distant since the events of this morning, and the tension from what happened is twisting my stomach in knots.

I don't know if I can handle this silent treatment much longer. Why did I have to freak out like that?

What if I've ruined everything...


[8 hours earlier...]

"What even is this to you?!" Rodrick gestures between us. I feign some semblance of ignorance, eyeing the stack of boxes strewn on the floor in front of me.

It's 10am at Vick's, and I'm a secret-stashing, in-denial, totally-freaked-out-coward, and I'm hiding it.

"This is a new shipment of posters that I need to sort through." I lean forward avoiding Rodrick's gaze and reach for a box.

Before I can graze a finger against any rough edge of cardboard, Rodrick grabs ahold of my wrist, and gently, but firmly, twists me around to meet him.

"Roxanna, don't play dumb with me. You know I'm way better at that game than you are."

Rodrick's eyes are wild, piercing straight through me and planting me in place. I conjure up some sort of indignant strength and manage to whip my arm from his iron-clad grip.

"Why are you even bringing this up right now?!" I whisper-yell at Rodrick's taut and reddening face.

Rodrick takes a step closer, chest straining and eyes burning in anger and exasperation. "You know why."

The truth is, he's right, and I know exactly why he is saying what he is saying. I've been off. I'm just too much of a coward to admit it to myself--what my strange behaviors and unfamiliar emotions truly mean. I won't admit it.

"I have no idea what you're talking about." Focusing my eyes on a multicolored disco ball across the room, I make a small prayer that its prismatic reflections will blind me, so that I can have an excuse to escape from this conversation.

Rodrick heaves a loaded half-sigh, half-grunt and plants his hands on my shoulders, tilting me up to face him. It's becoming almost impossible to avoid his intensely evaluating stare as he clasps me tighter, pulling my body in closer.

His presence, his gaze, acts like a magnet to my emotions, a dredge to my most deeply buried secrets. He can't know what I've been keeping from him. That something has changed.

I bring my gaze back to his. My stubborn defensiveness met with his mounting frustration leaves us locked in an intense stare off, neither of us willing to yield to the other.

Feeling bold, I make the first move.

"You want to know what this is? This is two people who work together, at school and at work, and generally enjoy each others' company. It's a thing I think some people refer to as 'friends,'" I spit out at him.

Rodrick abruptly turns his head to the side and scoffs. Shifting back to me, his eyes narrow and his lips quirk into a disgusted grin. "Oh, Roxanna, don't be so naive. If you truly believe that's all this is, you are sorely mistaken."

A damp heat is beginning to creep its way up my neck and my stomach is taking its time doing nervous, barrel rolls. Unnerving and incomprehensible emotions are welling up inside of me, and I need them to leave me the hell alone.

"What do you want me to say!" I'm raising my voice now, and I don't care. "We've been having a fun time together. I thought we both recognized that we were friends. What more do you want from me?!"

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