Off Record

Chapter 4

The Supreme leader senses his weakened state. Kylo is sure of it. As the colossal projection pierces him with its unwavering gaze, time seems suspended. That is until Hux strides in. The echoing hiss of the unsealed entrance accompanies the steady beat of a military gait void of hesitation, and Kylo finds himself fighting to conceal a sense of relief on top of the urge to attempt sniffling in the broken silence.

"Supreme Leader." Hux stands at attention without sparing Kylo so much as a glance. And just like that, Snoke's attention is split; Kylo feels it as palpably as a shift in temperature. If competition as ruthless as General Hux has seemingly failed to notice he's wearing thin, Kylo reasons, the Supreme Leader may at least believe that he's done a respectable job of powering through and masking his vulnerability. Hux has lunched enthusiastically into a report on the state of the First Order, one that Kylo should probably pay attention to incase he's asked for input. Force, he tries, but Hux is speaking at nearly incomprehensible speeds, spouting out numbers and schedules that don't resonate with anything but the pounding behind his eyes. Kylo decides early on that his energy is best spent standing up straight and suppressing shivers, which he hopes have inopportunely sprung up in response to a lack of blankets and not a rising fever. Most difficult of all is avoiding drips from his nose without the option of risking even one well-timed sniff. 

Kylo really does loathe his nose. He knows it's too big. He was made fun of for it by classmates when he was a Padawan, and even now, when no one without a death wish would dare do such a thing, it gives his face an unintimidating childishness that he is far more confident hiding behind a mask. And an air filter, for that matter, seeing how annoyingly sensitive it is. It's always the first thing to act up when he's sick; he had been sneezing his way through the Finalizer before he'd developed even a tickle in his throat. As far as Ren's concerned, it's his weakest point. He's honestly considered slicing off with his Saber more than once, but with his luck that would just make him even more prone to sneezing. It's so sore and stuffed right now, he's actually considering subjecting himself to the humiliation of asking Hux for another one of those wonderful handkerchiefs, if by some miracle this meeting ends. 

He really was feeling better before this. Everything still ached, but not quite as much, and every breath no longer felt like the onset of a cough or a.....oh no. As though just the thought of a sneeze has triggered it, a familiar sting tingles at the base of his nose. Kylo presses his tongue against the roof of his mouth and holds his breath. Though Snoke's eyes remain on Hux, Kylo feels his attention shift back to him; he can't so much a rub at his nose. After a stiff few seconds of painstakingly doing nothing, Kylo allows himself the necessary evil of a slow exhalation through his mouth. Though slowed a bit by his efforts, the sneeze continues to build. His throat stings. His eyes sting. The prickling itch spreads down his nose rapidly, all the way to the reddened tip. His nose, practically buzzing with the insatiable need, begins to twitch involuntarily. He simply can't help it. With an reflex gulp of air, Kylo unleashes a monstrous "Hept' AAKCTSHEEEW!!!"

...

It never gets easier, especially when it comes to Ren. Just once, Hux wishes a Kylo-related problem would work itself out, but it seems the man can't even manage to kick a cold so long as Hux is depending on him to do so. He had planned to proceed in the meeting with the Supreme Leader as if nothing was out of the ordinary and had been foolish enough to hope Ren would be able to do the same. However, as soon as he caught sight of the knight, who turned his obscenely pale face to watch Hux enter, the General felt like slapping said face. How could a grown man spend no less than a week in bed and still look like a kitten that's just been pulled out of a freezing lake? Force, even Ren's body hates him.

Well, Hux decides as he begins his report, he's done all he can in the way of attempting mutual benefit. He was practically Ren's personal nurse for Force's sake. Ren had failed to recover in time and was going to have to take the fall. After all, Hux reasons, only he knows how Kylo managed to come down with the bug. Ren may make the connection once he's finally well, but Hux doubts he'll be willing to remind anyone of his bought of vulnerability, especially not the Supreme Leader. Who knows, maybe the Kylo will be able to pull through the meeting after all. Hux hasn't heard a peep out of the man so far, a definite improvement over the snuffling human disaster that's been consuming his week, or any version of Kylo for that matter. But then, just as Hux begins to turn his full attention to his briefing, he's interrupted by an all too familiar explosion from his left. The sneeze throws Kylo forward and leaves him swaying limply like a ragdoll, setting off a miniature avalanche of rocks that fling themselves through Snoke's flickering hologram.

"Kylo Ren," the Supreme Leader's growl cuts through the faint echoes of the sneeze and its aftermath with the effectiveness of a lightsaber. "In all my years I have NEVER," he bellows, standing suddenly, "seen such a PATHETIC display!!" Kylo crashes to his knees, coughing as he gasps from the shock. He can't seem to catch is breath, hacking over the venomous silence. Mortified, Hux can't look away. Snoke glowers down, eyes maintaining all the rage of his screams as he sits again to assess his apprentice. Chest heaving, nose dripping on the bare floor, Ren shudders against the chill of his persistent fever. "You, heir of Vader, despite my training, have demonstrated the Force control of an INFANT. And because of a weakness so common. You have FAILED!! You are an utter disappointment, you useless, wretched child."

This hits Hux a bit harder than he was expecting. For the first time in years, he remembers his father. Properly remembers; not a flash of the cruel face in his own reflection, not a disassociated skill from his own "training" to make use of, but the man, Bredol Hux himself. Suddenly, standing aside to let Kylo crash and burn becomes difficult.

"To lack such basic discipline, over your mere physical body, is deplorable. And to let your feebleness affect your control of the Force..." Snoke takes a sickening pause, and for a moment Hux thinks Ren may be executed right then and there.

"Supreme Leader," Hux steps forward and intervenes far more meekly than he intended "I take full responsibility for Kylo Ren's state of health. His vaccinations were mis-scheduled during a quarantine I directly ordered." Abruptly joining Kylo on the floor, Hux lands on his face rather than his knees.

"I know, General." Snoke allows himself a satisfied smile. "Do not ever interrupt me again. Remember, your life is worth less than his." Ren coughs. "You are lucky I expect total disclosure in my subordinates. Consider hiding anything from me again, and you will be replaced. And you," he turns back to Ren, "Your training will become far less comfortable...when your strength is back. You're weaker than I could have ever anticipated." With that, the giant vanishes. Hux stands immediately, but Kylo, apparently down for the count, gears up for another sneeze. By now, Hux can see one coming from a mile away. He sees Ren's nostrils quiver and decides to take matters into his own hands; considering the rock-fall earlier, this isn't the safest place for Ren to let loose. Hux may not have ever seen the field, but he does have military training. Despite his thin frame, he's perfectly capable of slinging the majority Ren's oversized, overheated body onto his shoulder.

"he...hehShh! EXXXshuh! Uhh..EXXSHOO!" Hux winces as a bit of the spray hits the back of his neck.

"How many times do I have to tell you to cover your damn mouth, Ren?" he snaps, receiving only a groan in response. At least the damage is minimal. A few lights flicker weakly overhead. Ren must be drained. I should take him to Med Bay. He should be on the mend by now.

"No!" Ren croaks, and begins to squirm in what Hux can only assume is a sad attempt at an escape. But Hux has already decided.