21-Day Challenge

"It was impossible for it to come alive, wasn't it?" I asked my partners and scratched my leg. I should've said "is" and "isn't" but whatever. Screw my grammar. No one cares anyway, at least not here. I guess it's hard to shut down the English teacher in me, even in the wilds.

As Wez and Nessa searched through the brambles of our protective thorns, (cursing loudly each time they pricked themselves), I took the opportunity to sniff my pits.

Thirteen days into our challenge and I was pretty ripe. I imagined my body was looking as gritty as the soil I felt between my crusty toes.

"Cause it sure seems like everything else in this place is alive. I wouldn't be surprised if our map grew legs and walked away, too." I said, shuddering at the memory of the other day. I'd put my hand down to lean on a pile of sticks only to find that one of them had scales. I'm not sure who was more scared when I yelped in surprise, the snake or me.

My finger still smarted from the place where the snake'd bitten me. Thank goodness it'd only been a harmless rat snake. Had it've been something with deadly venom I'd of been a goner.

I wished I could help my partners look for our extraction map, but vision is my one weakness. I was the first blind contestant on this show.

My hearing, on the other hand, is superior to most folk.

"Guys, psst," I whispered, waving my hand to get their attention. "Do you hear that?"

They stopped in place, and I supposed, looked around our shelter. "Hear what, Masey?"

"That!" I exclaimed pointing frantically. "There's something coming from the Southeast. Shhh. Listen."

As we stood huddled close around our fire pit I could smell the scent of charred leg hairs.

Fear is a funny thing. Faced with a four-legged predator or a little sunburn from our fire, all three of us had chosen blisters over becoming cat food. Wild jaguars are not my cup of tea!

When a collection of twigs snapped close to my left I began to sing at the top of my lungs.

I just didn't plan the ridiculousness of what would come out of my mouth.

"Masey," Nessa shouted at me in a panic. "Are you singing "I'm the Map*" from Dora the Explorer*? As a freakin' jaguar stalks us? Are you serious?!?"

"What, you gotta better idea?" I hollered back between the words of the stupid tune. "We lost the freakin' map! I'm a mom. It was the first thing that popped into my head."

Wez banged loudly on a boulder behind us with what sounded like a large stick. "Go away, Cat! Get outta here, you bastard!"

In a rush of silence the shelter grew quiet all at once. A nocturnal bird cried in the distance. "Damn full moon," Nessa mumbled. She's our resident astrologer. If it's not the full moon she's worrying over, it's the current Mercury retrograde. "I knew I shoulda listened to my ephemeris! This trip was such a mistake!"

"I think it's gone, girls," Wez sighed as we plopped down onto the damp earth.

I heard Wez' deep breathing and imagined he was trying to settle any hysteria. We all kept our thoughts to ourselves as the realization that a large cat may have been ready to make a meal out of us tonight.

"It's like a bad cartoon. But, that was no Baby Jaguar** and I sure as shit ain't named Diego**."

My nerves were rattled. I was rambling to compensate.

"What the hell are you talking about, Masey?" Wez asked. "Who is Diego and what do you mean, 'Baby Jaguar'**? You're not making any sense."

I ignored Nessa and started singing the "Go Diego Go Theme Song" from the kids' show.

I think I was going into shock.

"Medic!" Nessa shouted. "We need a medic!"

So much for making it to 21 days...

------------------------------------------------------

Cartoon Reference Information:
*Sitron, J. & Straus, B. (2000-2019). I'm the Map. Weiner, M. Dora the Explorer. Nickelodeon Animation Studio. California, USA.

**Noriega, G. & Someillan, J. (2005-2011). Go Diego Go Theme Song**. Nickelodeon Animation Studios. USA & Canada.

This story is a fictionalized tale of what might happen to three participants on the show, "Naked and Afraid." This is the reference information about the reality show:

Renfroe, J., Garfinkle, D., Rankin, S., Bittner, M., Contis, D. & Boyle, J. (2013-present). Naked and Afraid. Discovery Channel. Renegade 83. USA.