Going Full Throttle

Chapter 53

~ Tyler ~

There were very few points in my life where I could say I was truly happy. Don't get me wrong, I've enjoyed many parts. The parties, the fame, and the girls—even though I feel gross now to say that. I enjoyed it all.

But was I happy?

Not really. I just didn't know it at the time. I thought feeling powerful or successful was the same as happy. Fuck was I wrong.

I knew this for absolute certainty the second I woke up in the hotel with Finn tucked against my side and Pia on the other. My arms were numb from laying out straight under their heads all night, but I couldn't care less. Pia's hair tangled around her face, fanning over my shoulder. She had managed to not completely climb up on me, but her leg was still thrown over my thigh. Finn's mouth popped open into a pout as he drooled on my chest.

Honestly, they both slept like the dead and looked like absolute messes.

But they were my messes.

And that's when I realized that this is what happiness felt like. Pure, simple, no bells, no whistles, just holding my family in my arms.

My tattoos had been born from an alcohol adventure to Fitz's artist. Somehow though, from my drunken ramblings about Pia and Finn, the artist had actually nailed it. They were my strength.

It was confusing though. On one hand, their presence in my life did make me strong. I'd never felt like more of a man than laying here and holding them both as they slept. It triggered a protective instinct in me. Like if anyone were to walk through that door, whether they wanted to hurt them or just wake them up—I'd fight to the death. Even with one leg, I'd go down swinging against any threat to their health or happiness.

On the other hand, I had never felt weaker or more exposed. My heart no longer beat in my chest, protected by bone, muscle, and flesh. It beat outside of my body now, walking around wherever Pia and Finn went. It was the most vulnerable I'd ever allowed myself to be. But instead of running from the fear, I was more determined than ever to stay as close to them as possible.

Finn mumbled under his breath and tossed around on my chest. I grinned as his big round eyes slowly blinked open and focused on me.

"G..mmning," he muttered as he squinted through one eye.

"Mornin' bud," I whispered. He flopped back onto my chest and twirled his messy hair around his finger as I rubbed his back. It took him a while to fully wake up, but he eventually popped up with bright eyes and a wide smile. Taking a peek at Pia, I shushed Finn gently.

I managed to extricate my arm from under Pia and nudged Finn out of bed. He picked up my crutches as I swung my legs over the edge of the mattress. I accepted them and stood with a soft groan as my muscles tensed.

Over the course of my career, I had broken several bones. It was inevitable in dirt biking. When bones and metal clashed, metal always won. But I had to admit, this was the worst by far. I'd only been on the crutches for twenty-four hours and my back was killing me.

When the fuck did I get old?

Finn and I went to the bathroom as quietly as we could to brush our teeth and get ready for the day. I popped my medication into my mouth and used the tap to wash it all down. By the time we were back in our room, Pia sat up in bed and stretched her arms over her head.

"Where are you two off to?" Pia yawned as she took us in. Her eyes lingered on Finn's outfit then skewered me with humoured judgement. Look, if this kid chose to match pink flamingos with yellow polka-dots, that's on him. Not me.