𝗦𝗶𝘅 𝗙𝗲𝗲𝘁 𝗔𝗽𝗮𝗿𝘁 || 𝗝𝗜𝗟𝗜𝗫

SO FAR BUT SO CLOSE

▪︎—[❤︎]—▪︎

   Jisung avoids everyone's eyes as he walks into the classroom. On the whiteboard in big, bold, black letters is "POETRY". Jisung isn't too bad at poetry — or well, he wasn't in his opinion anyway.

   Literature class was his favourite class. The teacher was quite kind towards him, and his classmates never really bothered him. On top of that, Jisung enjoyed writing. Jisung walks to the back of the class, where he always sits, and takes a seat. He puts his backpack on the back of his wooden chair before turning to face the whiteboard.

   In his peripheral view he can see someone making a failed attempt at whispering to another, asking about the teacher. Jisung assumes that this boy is a new student. He has a sharp jawline, a cute nose, and blond hair. Jisung finds him attractive, and decided that there's no harm in admiring the view for a bit — until those pretty, brown eyes meet his own.

   Jisung panics, frantically turning his body to face the front of the class once more. In the process, he hits his ulnar nerve — or, well, his funny bone — and yelps loudly. All heads turn towards him in confusion, and Jisung thinks he might just cry when he hears the new student and his new friend laugh out loud. He's grateful that the rest of the class doesn't follow in their footsteps and just turn to the front of the class.

   Jisung puts his head down, pure humiliation and rage flowing through his veins. Just then, the teacher walks back into the classroom, rubbing his hands together. Everyone's attention drifts to the man at the front of the class who pushes his glasses up and claps his hands before speaking.

   "Right, class! How is everyone today?" he asks. The class replies in mostly groans, apart from the few students who reply in coherent words - but the groans are too loud to hear them anyway. Their teacher chuckles.

   "Now, now, everyone. It's only nine in the morning. Hopefully your day gets better by the time you get home," the man says.

   "Being here is literally the reason we are not enjoying our day!" one of the other students answers, and Jisung recognizes that voice as the male who was speaking to the new student earlier.

   The class erupts into laughter, while the teacher just shakes his head. Mr. Bang wasn't too strict with his students, so nobody was worried about getting into any major trouble. He was quite lenient with his students, actually. The man would only really give detentions to people who would bully others, or anything of that sort.

   "Very funny, Kim Seungmin." he says, and majority of the class giggles. Jisung rests his head on his forearms, waiting for the class to really begin.

   Then, Mr. Bang begins to explain the subject of today's lesson. Jisung can hear everyone take their notebooks out, but he doesn't have to worry because his is already on the desk. When their teacher is done explaining, he instructs everyone to begin writing. Jisung hears slow footsteps and then feels a hand ruffling his already messy hair. He looks up and is immediately met by his teacher's comforting smile, as well as a subtle thumbs up. Jisung musters up all his energy to give a small smile in return, picking up his blue pen and pulling his notebook towards him.

   Jisung wants to write his poet about his struggles. He thinks it would be a good, emotional piece, that might earn him more of Mr. Bang's favour. Still, Jisung does not. He begins to scribble down whatever words he could think of, painfully aware of how horrific this poem is compared to anything he has ever written before. Each stanza visibly gets worse, and Jisung wants to cry.

   At the end of the class, Mr. Bang asks to see everyone's poems. Jisung panics. His poem is not good — hell, it does not even make sense. Unfortunately, he is still obliged to turn it in.

   Mr. Bang picks up Jisung's poem and Jisung is panicking. Confusion is visible in his gaze as his eyes trail the words of what is definitely the most meaningless, messy, and poorly-written poem he has ever written.

   "Jisung, could you come up here please?" Mr. Bang calls, and Jisung has to swallow the lump in his throat. His anxiety has boosted drastically as he is now stood beside Mr. Bang's desk, trying to help him read through the messy handwriting. When he is done reading, the teacher looks up at Jisung. Jisung is chewing his strawberry gum subtly, trying to calm his nerves. The look he gives him makes his heart tear into pieces, and Mr. Bang whispers the most heart-wrenching words Jisung had heard all week.

   "I'm disappointed." Mr. Bang shakes his head. He says it lowly enough for nobody to hear — not that anyone was paying attention anyways, since he had given the class the last five minutes to do whatever they wanted. Jisung nods wordlessly, Mr. Bang's facial expression getting harder to look at. He looked so disappointed — as if he were a puppy whose owner had not paid him any attention.

   "I hope you can learn from this and do better next time. You are truly a talented writer, Jisung. I'm not quite sure what this is," he raises up the piece of paper and reads one of the sentences again, shaking his head before continuing - "but it is definitely your worst work." he finishes. Mr. Bang nods, agreeing with his own words before rubbing Jisung's back. Jisung can feel the lump grow larger, tears filling his eyes as he nods in response. His teacher offers him a small grin, and Jisung can't even return it.

   The bell rings, and Jisung bows before rushing to his desk. He grabs his backpack and rushes out of the classroom, already aware of where he is going. The hallways are filled with people trying to get to their next classes, and Jisung feels like he is crammed up in a locker.

   Jisung shuts the bathroom door, running to a stall and falling on top on the toilet lid. He sits down, locking the stall door. His hand moves to clutch at his chest, feeling his heart beating unusually fast under his palm.

   Loud sobs are all that could be heard in the bathroom as Jisung attempted to calm himself down. His hands are shaking and his chest feels like he is in physical pain. Jisung's hyperventilating and crying is much too loud for a knock on the bathroom door to be heard.

   Jisung only notices that someone is in the bathroom when he hears a knock on the stall door. His eyes widen and his anxiety worsens. He bites down hard on his hand, trying to stop his crying.

   "Are you okay in there? May I come in?" the voice asks. Jisung takes note of how deep the voice is, as well as how unfamiliar it sounds.

   "Yeah, I'm— it's all good," Jisung's voice is shaky, and if that wasn't enough, he hiccups right after speaking. He hears the stranger on the other side giggle.

   "You don't sound fine," the voice says, and Jisung gulps. He unlocks the door, opening it and seeing the new student in front of him. The door slams shut. What the fuck is Jisung to do now?