Hey guys! So just a warning- this part may be triggering. I'm not sure so read at your own risk. I am in no way promoting self harm. If you have the urge to do it, contact someone or dm me if you don't know who. You're beautiful and I love you.
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Cassi's POV
Ever since Gerard and I started dating, I could basically see the tension between the two brothers. So me, being the person I am, decided to try and fix whatever was going on. I was sitting with Gerard, Frank, and Ray. Well I should correct myself. I was sitting while Gee and the Fro Princess were arguing about a certain guitar riff. When I say "arguing" I'm putting it very, very lightly. They were practically ripping each other's throat out and honestly, Ray wasn't saying anything. Gerard was just exploding and I didn't know why. Frank was watching him, looking disgusted. His face instantly lit up though when his phone let out a ding, alerting him that he had gotten a text.
"How could you even suggest that? What, are you fucking retarded?!" Gerard roared. I stood from my seat and pulled Gerard back, an steel expression on my face
"I don't know who's fucking period you're on but this shit's got to stop." I seethed. "You don't disrespect my friends. Hell you shouldn't disrespect anyone. And so help me god if I catch you trying to fuck over my friend's mind, you won't live to see the light of tomorrow." I growled at him while gripping his arm.
"Why don't you just fuck off, cunt?" He sneered. It felt like I was stabbed in the stomach. I took a few steps away from him. A cold chill settled over me. He rolled his eyes before walking down the hallway. A door slammed and I slumped back on the couch. He'd been like this for a while and I couldn't figure out why. He would just randomly get really angry and scream at me. Frank looked at me.
"You shouldn't have to take that." He said simply. I shrugged.
"I love him. Strange enough, it's true. Maybe fast, but true." He nodded but sighed.
"Just don't dig yourself into something you can't get out of." He said grimly. I rolled my eyes before asking the guys if they wanted to go to the movies. Of course they agreed and I stood to ask Gerard if he wanted to come. I asked Ray to invite Mikey before I knocked timidly on his door.
"Yeah?" He yelled. I took that as an invitation to walk in. Apparently this was the wrong assumption. Shoot me- I wanted to see my boyfriend. His room was dark and kind of cryptic. Wadded up papers littered the floor and the covers were practically ripped off the bed. There were dead flowers on his desk- blackening and wilting. A pool of the hardened petals lightly dusted his desk and floor. He sat on his bed, facing away from me. I stepped in and closed the door, alerting him of my presence. He jumped slightly before turning, a glare on his face.
"I don't remember giving you permission to come in here." He sneered. I shrugged and sat next to him. Without a word, he stood and moved away from me. I sighed before falling back on his bed.
"Do you want to go to the movies with us?" I asked. He thought before answering.
"Sure. Why not? Not like I have anything to do." He said shrugging. I nodded and left his room. I don't know why I expected him to apologize. He never had before. I felt the tears prick the back of my eyes. I groaned and ran to the bathroom near his room. I quickly closed and locked the door. I could feel the sob stuck in my throat but forced it to a cough. I couldn't take this. But I loved him. There's no way in hell that I'm leaving him. None. I just.... I just needed a release. Now. But I wasn't somewhere personal. I couldn't do it here. My wrist was just aching for the sharp feel of my silver little devil. I wanted to feel my blood run down my arm. I wanted to feel the pain. No. I needed it. So I decided that I would go to the movies. I would make them think I'm totally okay. Then I go home and do what I need to. I splashed water on my face before walking out with a bright smile. They all stood around, just waiting.
"Took you long enough." Gerard muttered. Another knife in my back. I felt my smile waver but fixed it as soon as I could. Only Mikey took notice. He gave me a concerned look but I simply shrugged before addressing everyone.
"Alright everyone ready?" I asked. They nodded and I led them out the door with my wrists still longing for the ache.
Just a few more hours.
Just
A
Few...
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Hi so heavy chapter haha thanks for reading, favoriting, and commenting and I love you all!
Bye my little psychopaths!
YOU ARE READING
I'm okay (ON HOLD)
FanfictionWhen Cassi met Gerard she didn't think anything would grow from his mysterious hate toward her. Soon, sparks start to fly between the two but will the distance between them be too much to bear?
