teach me how to heal (bxb)

C6- I Don't Want To Be Alone

Sorry if my styles a lil different today It's been a while

By the time I was done crying, we were sitting on my bed, me positioned between his legs. It wasn't long before I snapped out of it and shoved him off my bed.

"Sorry, I-," I started to apologize.

"No, I get it." He said. Is he mad? I don't know if he's mad. That's something someone who's mad would say. Oh, god, I messed up. Shit.

"Hey," a firm voice said. I cringed away from him, bringing my arms up to defend myself from the angry man.

"Hey," he whispered. "Didn't I say I wouldn't hurt you? I'm not one to break a promise," he said gently. I waited a second, to see what he would do.

"You're not mad?" I asked, feeling brave for a second, before putting my arms back down. I looked up and he shook his head.

"No, what made you think that?" He asked. Don't insult him. He's trying to get me to make him angry. I shrugged. He sighed and started walking out.

"I'm gonna chill in my room. Come over if you're lonely or bored. I'm right next to you on the left," he pointed to his door before walking in and closing the door behind him.

I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding. Did he really mean what he said? That he won't hurt me? It's better safe than sorry. I'll be careful around him.

After a while, I felt myself getting upset again. My eyes aches and my hands shook. I don't want to be alone. I got up without thinking and walked out mindlessly.

I knocked on Bailey's door, waiting for an answer.

"Come in!" He said loudly. I obeyed and walked into his room. He looked surprised.

"Oh, hi! What's up?" He smiled a little. I stared blankly. Does he care if I answer?

"Ben?" He asked. Oh he's asking me to talk.

"I don't want to be alone." I said simply. His face softened, while mine stayed blank, except for the small tears streaming down my face.

"Come here," he gestured next to him and I walked over and timidly sat, not knowing what to expect.

He noticed my stiffness and gently hovered his hand above my opposite shoulder, asking for permission. I leaned towards him slightly, showing him it's okay, and he pulled me into him.

"Tell me what's wrong." He asked. He looked genuine. My barrier began to crack as I cried into him for the second time that night.

"I just don't get it! Mom and dad are in prison and it's all my fault! They did nothing wrong at all! I made them do everything! I should be in trouble not them!" He stroked my hair back comfortingly.

"Ben. If you don't mind me asking, what did they do to get in trouble?" He asked carefully.

"Nothing!" I cried.

"I know. What I mean was: why are they in prison?"

"B-because my neighbors c-called the police and they- they took them to jail." I briefly explained.

"What did the judge say they're charged with?" He asked another question.

"Child abuse," I sniffled. He hugged me a little tighter and I felt... safe.