Disturbed Mind (Sequel to AYRT?)

Chapter-17

Another early update?!?!?! WHAT?!?! YUP! Because I love you guys SO MUCH!!!!

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I sat on the swings trying to rid my self of the painful memories of this morning and yesterday.

"Be a good boy Vicky." What did he mean by that? Was he really taunting me right now? I squeezed my eyes shut and opened them quickly remembering what was in my pocket. The paper and the box cutter. I carfully pulled them out and studied them. I carfully took the box cutter and cut the the paper in half. Well that cuts nice. I put the paper back and held the razo between my thumb and index finger.

Will it hurt again? Will it be like the old feelings, relief, purity, sanity? The only way I'll find out is if- NO! I stopped myself before mindlessly putting the razo to my wrist. I jumped when I saw a hand on mine. I looked up and saw Jade smiling down at me. She lifted her sleeve and I gasped at the sight of her arms.

She had long gashes and scars running up and down and side to side. She took the razo from me and walked behind me to the nearby pond. I watched as she thew the sharp object, the siver shining every time it spun in the light of the sun. It was almost in slow motion as it fell in the water.

She pulled out her phone and typed a few things as she walked back to me. She handed me her phone and sat next to me.

"You've done so well, Scar told me you just got out. What made you change?"

"I can't tell you." I sighed handing her phone back. She nodded and typed something else then handed it back.

"I'll make you a deal. I'll tell you why I'm mute and cut you tell me why you feel the need to again."

"Really?" I looked up at her and she smiled and shrugged. "Okay... Deal." I said. She stuck out her hand and I took it sealing the deal. "It's official. We will tell each other everything." She smiled and stated typing again but my phone started ringing Kellin's ringtone. "Shit! I forgot I was suposed to go over to my boyfriend's afterschool. Sorry Jade." I told her as I answered my phone.

"Hey babe what time you coming over?" Kellin asked.

"Um I'll be there at around 4:30 I need to stop at home." I said as I lit a joint.

"Okay my love I'll see you then. Love you bye." I smiled at his cuteness.

"Love you too. Bye." I said and hung up the phone. Jade handed me hers and smiled.

"We can talk tomorrow. You need him right now." It said. I looked at her and smiled giving her back her phone and giving her a hug and a kiss on top of her head.

When I got home I was already feeling the effects of the Marijuana kick in causing me to laugh at the door mat because it looked like a sponge. I walked in to the house and smiled when Bandit came running at me.

"Bicky can we play?" She asked.

"Not today mija Bicky is going to Kellin's house today. I'm sorry." I pouted as she did too.

"Tomorrow?" I nodded and gave her a kiss on the head and made my way up stairs to take a shower.

I let the hot water run over me letting it warm my body. I looked at my arms and smiled. Not only because I was high but because I had no new marks on me, because of Jade. I jumped when I heard someone knock on the bathroom door.

"Vic, hurry up kiddo other people live in this house too you know." Frank said.

"I'm washing my hair almost done." I said as I soaped up my hair and began rinsing it. I got out and chanded in to clean clothes before leaving to Kellin's.

"Hey I missed you!" Kellin smiled as he gave me a passionate kiss. He bit my lip and foced his tounge in to my mouth alowing me to taste that he had something to drink.

"Mmm. Have you been drinking?" I asked before he took things to far.

"I just had a shot of Jack before you came." He smiled. "I'm not drunk I swear." he added. I nodded and followed him to his room.

We go to his room and he was quick to put his lips on mine again forcing his was in to my mouth. He was really dominate today, he had me pinded against the closed door moving his hips with mine letting me feal his hard on against my leg. Fear rose in me as his hands traveled south trying to unbutton my jeans. The memories of earlyer flooded back and left me screaming inside.

"Wait, wait. Stop please." I said as the memories flooded back. My heart was racing and my palms got sweaty. Kellin pulled back and looked at me confused. I noticed too that I was to scared to even get up.

Ronnie has created this block for me to be intimate with my own boyfriend. I looked at Kellin and quickly glaced down then back up. His eyes looked down curious of I was looking at. His mouth was a little agape almost like he was offended that nothing happened. Oh god he just got the wrong idea.