All in the name of

3. Lost

Brett was taken aback by Eddy's reaction to the dark.

"Hey Eddy.. it wasn't that bad, was it? Or are you scared of the dark?"

"No, it's not that.. it's just.. I missed you."

Brett let out a soft chuckle.

"I was away from you for literary 2 minutes Eddy."

"I know.. I'm sorry.. I'm being stupid. It's just that I felt so safe in your arms before"

"It's okay. You're not being stupid. You just needed a longer hug, right? If that's gonna help you, I can do that. It's not a problem. Are you still upset about your friends?"

Eddy let out a sigh.

"I guess.. I mean, I'm not upset about them.. they're not bad friends.. they're nice guys. But what kinda friends are they if I can't even tell them the truth that I'm not attracted to girls..?"

"You don't trust them?"

"I think I'm scared of what they would think of me..."

"Well.. I suppose coming out to your friends can be really difficult. But you know what, they could still be good friends that are trustworthy to come out to, if you just gave them a chance, y'know."

Eddy gently pulled away a bit to look at Brett's face.

"What about you Brett? Have you ... come out to your friends?"

Brett gave Eddy's question some thought.

"Well.. actually I never made any official announcements... I mean most people.. the straights don't go around announcing their preferences, so why should people with alternative choices have to? In my case, my friends gradually worked it out by themselves.. for themselves. They'd see me with a girlfriend or a boyfriend or whatever.. and they draw their own conclusions depending on how long they've known me so I'm either straight, gay, bi, pansexual or whatever. Not that I care what they think."

Eddy furrowed his brows.

"..You don't care?"

Brett shrugged. 

"No. I don't"

"What if people ask you straight out what you are?"

Brett gave out a smirk.

"Well... don't you think unless that person and I have a mutual desire to jump into the sack together that it's not any of their business?."

"...You've got a point there. So what do you actually say to them?"

"Hmm.. I guess I would ask them why they would want to know. Sometimes they do wanna jump into the sack with me. Then of course I don't mind them asking. If not... really, it's none of their business, isn't it?"

"But what if someone keeps pushing you for an answer?"

"Hmm... I might just tell them that I'm flattered but they're not my type?"

Eddy gave out a giggle.

"Really?"

"Well I've never had anyone who actually pushed me to reply like that.. but I think that's how I'd feel if they were really pushing me for an answer when they don't even fancy me. Or more importantly, I don't fancy them."

"That makes perfect sense. Geez Brett"

"What?"

"I wish I was as strong as you."

"You do?"

"I feel so ...lost."

"Eddy, I don't understand, why would you say you're lost? You're not lost. You're right here with me, in my arms where you feel safe and comfortable, right ? And the beauty of it is that you chose to be here."

"Hmm"

"And I'm happy that you made this choice."

"Brett.. is life that simple?"

"I think so... At least I'd like to believe it's meant to be."

"Like I said, I wish I was as strong as you, Brett."

"I don't think it's about strength. It's more about knowing what you can and can't control. You can't control what other people think. So stressing over it is a waste of time."

"So what can I control, Brett?"

"Choices, Eddy. You can control your choices. You can choose how you feel. You can choose to let things upset you or not. You can choose who you want to hug.. well, so long as the other person is also willing."

"You were willing. Or were you not? I kinda threw myself at you."

Brett chuckled.

"Yeah you kinda surprised me there a bit but it's okay, I was willing Eddy. I wanted to help you. So I think you've made a damn good choice."

"Gosh, how can I be like you?"

"..You want to be like me?"

"Yeah, I really do."

"Well that should be easy, you should just go ahead and try it"

Eddy looked up, stunned.  Brett snapped his fingers.

*click*

"Just like that"

Eddy gave a shy smile.  He also snapped his fingers.

*click*

"Just like that, huh?"

Brett gave a warm smile.

"Yeah.. just like that."