So NOT a Conformist

Tears

Friday. It's finally Friday. These were the first thoughts to come to my head, the second that my alarm went off. The second thought, was; I'm gonna see Michael today...

And about, then, is when I started freaking out.

I stood quickly and checked my phone. 5:35 exactly. The bus leaves at 6:48 so I had about an hour. I crossed over to my dresser quickly, and dug through my drawers. The best shirt I owned was my 'Red Hot Chili Peppers' band-t . I through it on, and began nervously combing my long thin fingers through my hair.

I found my red skinny jeans that matched perfectly and my black converse. I brushed my hair, and lit a cigarette. I went into the house to find the coffee maker already running. I thanked whatever God may be watching. After waiting a few minutes, I poured a large cup.

I walked out to the front door and opened it. Leane was gone. Her silver impalla was missing from the driveway. I walked back into the kitchen and eyed the coffee pot. I looked back at my cup.

I held my stare at the coffee pot, before grabbing the handle and bringing it back into the garage with me. I set it down on my coffee table and continued my usual morning routine.

I smoked another cigarette. It just wouldn't calm my nerves. I knew I had to calm down, but I couldn't stop refilling my cup every time there was room to.

I checked my phone again. 6:07. You have to be kidding me.

I started pacing back and forth. Hitting my cigarette every few breathes. What would he say? Would he even care? What if nothing has changed?.... But what if.... What if he does care? What if he does have something to say about it? What if he doesn't have anything to say to me at all?

Slam!

I heard the front door of the house slam shut as fatass headed for the bus stop, down the street. That means... I checked my phone again. 6:40. I've been playing the 'what if' game for a half an hour.

I walked out my side door, locking it. I made my way around to the front of my house. Kyle was walking to the stop. He lived a little further down the street from us. "Hey Saddle." He called and waited for me to catch up.

"Uh, hey Kyle. What's up?" I asked, so very obviously confused by his lack of hostile behavior.

"Not much. I just started dating Bebe about a month ago." He told me. It was weird that he thought I cared. But whatever life decided to give me to help ease my mind was welcomed with grace.

Soon we approached the stop and our conversation was cut short. It was weird enough that he was waisting his time on me , and now, his girlfriend was watching. His Wendy-loving, Saddie-hating, girlfriend.

When the bus pulled up, I waited for the group of assholes... I mean kids to get on. And then I followed. I sat where I usually sat, in the front.

The bus driver, scared most kids. But she fastinated me. I've never spoken to her, but I liked to watch her. I noticed how, when we hit a pot-hole, she'd twitch. And she made a weird noise every time we went over a speed bump.

But today, I didn't watch her. Instead, I sat and sipped my coffee, and drummed my fingers on the seat. I missed the piano. It's something I haven't done in ages. Not that I was any good. But it was still fun.

I tried my hardest to block out thoughts and just play on my imaginary piano. It became very difficult though, when I heard Wendy calling out to me. "Mercedes!" She called. I turned to face her.

"What, whore?" I asked hostility clear in my tone. She didn't seem to be fazed. She got up from her seat and came over to me. I could see students standing or leaning, a few even moving up to get a better look.