i get what i want (can you want me too?)

chapter 1

beauty has always been a factor of success in some fields of life. recognizably beautiful people mostly took it as a gift while others thought it was a curse, stealing spots from them in a lifestyle they could do nothing but look at from afar all because they weren't up to standards.

standards were never something high for hyunjae. his gifted beauty made him the standard and he never complained.

actually, he found wicked joy in it, in being something almost no one could reach or be very close to. he held his ego high in the way pupils shake when his name is mentioned or his presence found in the room. his rivals also only fueled him to spray extra cologne, wear a brighter color, raise his fringe higher, add another swipe of lip-gloss over his already shining lips.

they only drove him to be better, better than them.

hyunjae got familiar with his new agency faster than he expected. his contract ended with his previous agency after five years of modelling for their magazines and invited to fashion shows around the country whether for critics or walking down the runway.

his job remains the same, spending his days in the modern building getting dolled up in a room, moving to another to change into luxurious clothes and finally walking into the basement studio, a smile across his face as he sets up to start posing for the flashing cameras.

it was natural for him, just like his beauty, to stare into the camera or somewhere behind it and never blink even at the brightest flashes and lights surrounding him whenever his pictures are taken. he's always finished his photoshoots politely, his manners bowing his back down and rolling his tongue in honey words of gratefulness and cheering for the good job done.

being high and mighty and highly sought throughout the company and its employees, hyunjae frequently found himself going high in the elevator to reach the top floors and get his schedules and requests and opportunities from the ceo himself. he once even heard that the old man also calls him up so that he can ogle at him, check him out and hold hyunjae's beauty to himself instead of others.

hyunjae laughed to himself and pushed a strut into his steps when he walked into the highest floor; the ceo's unexplainably and unnecessarily huge office with a wide, fancy corner for his secretary. hyunjae may have swung his hips more than usual, more than he needed to, but it was okay, he enjoyed the eyes on him, trying to see through his clothes.

time after time, it was summer soon enough and hyunjae hated the heat. he hated the burn of it, the sweat from it. he got a message to meet up at the office for discussions for the fall collection fashion show and frankly, hyunjae was a little tired and wanted to have his own show there. at some time throughout his months at the new company, millions of eyes were useless to him if he wasn't looking at the silent beauty show hyunjae would prepare on himself at home for his eyes only.

he heard a couple of praises from some workers about how he was always excited and happy, ready to have meetings and get into the ceo's office to agree to shows and photoshoots. hyunjae replied with agreements, exaggerating in his enthusiasm a bit but he didn't care, it always worked on them, made them believe him and cherish him even more.

it was true, to some extent. he was always happy to be going up the elevator, counting along the red, digital numbers as they increased one by one. his smile was always wide and amused whenever he walked into the office and took a seat on one of the couches in front of the wide mahogany desk.

hyunjae paid attention to every word being said, he cared enough to know details of where he will be put, what he will do. however, he didn't care enough about where the company dinner will be or how much the photoshoot is expected to profit them. he knew for sure the ceo has enough pride to host the dinner at the fanciest restaurants and that 75 percent of the profits go purely for hyunjae.