Maya & Jonathan IV

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"Look at me." He says.

"Please leave me alone."

"If you want space from me, I will leave. But you're going to sit here and smoke the rest of these and feel like shit. I can't have that." The look in his dark eyes is so intense I can't hold it. "I fucked up, Maya. If nothing else, I fucked up as your best friend."

My face begins to crumble again but I get the words out before I lose my will. "You've been so mean."

"Let me make it right." His hands cup my face, forcing my eyes to his. There is pure emotion in them, the Jonathan that has gotten me through really tough times. "Let me explain myself."

Without thinking much about it, I throw my hands around his neck and pull him into a tight, awkward hug. "I thought you hated me." My voice comes out muffled and childish.

"My little baby." He mutters his favourite thing he likes to call me. It seems like he wants to say more, but he pushes me back and climbs in bed with me. I breathe in his smell, soap and whiskey and leather while wiggling to make space for him.

Soon to find out space isn't what he wants.

His arms come around my waist, right over where my tank top has slipped out. I hold my breath, not understanding where we stand anymore and where to go from here. But a pressing need to confess builds in me.

"I saw you taking her into the pantry. I was so -" I swallow. "I don't know. Hurt and jealous. I wanted to do something that would feel good. I thought it would feel good. But it didn't."

Jonathan is quiet for a while, but I can almost hear the storm of thought. He wears a small frown each time he goes into think mode.

"I thought I knew what I wanted." He says quietly. "I've been interested in Anya for as long as you've wanted Aahil. Maybe I didn't want to date her, but it was there. I don't know anymore."

"Oh." I say dumbly. "Why?"

"I can't stop thinking about you."

My eyes shoot upto his and warm, delicious hope blooms in my stomach. Words just wither and fall off because I really don't know what I can say to that.

"Why do you look so surprised?" He gives me a lazy smile.

"I thought you were going to hit and run." I frown.

"Run where?" The smile starts to stretch further across his face. "We live together."

"Then why -"

"You were using me." He swallows. "At least that's what I thought. I thought you just wanted to get off. Like you were with me just because you couldn't have him. Pity fuck."

My face sours. "That's not nice."

"It's not." His eyes fall shut, and he takes a deep breath. My gaze follows the channels of his throat, his strong jaw and his pretty lips. My stomach tightens in response. Without thinking, I press my lips into his throat.

I hear him suck a sharp breath, hand turning into a claw on my flesh. "Don't fucking start anything you can't finish, Maya."

"I'm not." But I press my lips harder into his neck, grip tightening on his t-shirt. "I can't stop."

His hand dips under my t-shirt and he squeezes to get a yelp out of me. "You're so infuriating. I don't know if I want to throttle you or make you forget your name."

I can't help my laugh, but it ends as a soft moan as his hot breath blows close to my ear. I reach up and brush my lips against his.

He grabs my throat harshly and pushes me down into the bed, looming over me. His possessive hold and those dark eyes studying my entire face sends jolts of electricity down my spine. I could be here forever. Under him, with him watching me like I'm the only thing he can see.

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