Sorry Not Sorry: Dreams, Mistakes And Growing Up With Naya Rivera

BEING A CHILD ACTOR-AND LIVING TO TELL THE TALE

The Royal Family only lasted one season, but I really believe that it had all the elements of a great sitcom and could have been as successful as The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air or Family Matters if Redd hadn't passed away.

When this happened, my family obviously mourned Redd's death, but we also mourned the passing of the show. That kind of opportunity doesn't come along very often, and when I was cast on the show, we saw it as the beginning of a long career—it was tough to watch it kind of sputter to a halt less than a year later. I could have been the Tatyana Ali of my day, and picking up residuals forever.

In retrospect, though, I think that everything happened for me with my career at the perfect time. If I'd been a successful kid actor, I'd probably be way more crazy than I am now, and doing fucked-up things with those residual checks!

I think it's hard for child actors to make the transition to adulthood (on-screen and offscreen), because they have everything they want at such an early age. You get tons of attention and people are always telling you how great you are, not to mention all the material perks. Even though you're a little kid, people turn you into the boss. This happens especially when the kid becomes the breadwinner in the family, and I think that is hard for the kids and the parents—how are you going to discipline a kid when they're the one making all the money?

Also, when you're super successful as a little kid, you're not mentally developed enough to understand that things could change at any time. You just think your life is always going to be this cool—then, all of a sudden, you hit that awkward stage in life, your roles start to dry up, and you're back to being a normal kid even though you're totally unprepared for normalcy.

Even if you still manage to keep it somewhat together, you're always going to struggle to get casting directors and audiences to see you as anything other than that kid from that thing (see Haley Joel Osment or Jonathan Lipnicki). I find the Olsen twins incredibly impressive, because they somehow managed to make the switch from cute kids to cool adults without losing their minds, but I also think it's no surprise that they decided to focus on something other than acting. Sometimes I get annoyed when people assume I was just starting out when I was on Glee—when I've really been working since I was five—but on the whole I'm really thankful that I got to have several years of low-key, behind-the-scenes training.

As frustrating as it is not to get what you want right away, success is a lot sweeter when it's a slow build. You want to always be getting better, and to be moving on to bigger opportunities. You want to be looking forward, not looking back wistfully at how you had everything you'd ever wanted at age six. Who wants to peak as a kid, as a teenager, or even in their early twenties? Then it's all downhill for the next six decades, and that's just—well, yikes!

I plan to live a long time, and I want each stage of my life to get progressively more fancy. If it's all uphill from here, and I've still got some work to put in, then that's fine by me.

I prefer it that way.

SORRY:

Making fun of an alleged crack baby on the playground. Wherever you are, Melissa, I am so sorry about that.Male prisoners writing fan letters to a five-year-old. Oof . . . just creepy.Missed photo ops with super hot legendary rappers (though this sorry mostly falls on my parents).Drooling on Nicole Richie's knee (sorry, girl).Redd Foxx's premature death and losing such a talented comedian, a warm person, and a loving surrogate grandpa.

NOT SORRY:

Getting introduced to my passion—acting—while still in preschool and knowing even then that it was what I wanted to do for the rest of my life.Learning to memorize lines before I even learned to spell (an invaluable skill that's stuck with me).All the outfits Redd got me (can't go wrong with head-to-toe gold) and all the outfits I got to wear on Family Matters.That Barbie Jeep, though . . .That I didn't become a famous child actor or peak at age nine.