not everything is set in stone

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It felt like forever until his heart stopped racing and his hands stopped shaking. It was awful being alone while he panicked, but the only person available to help was the reason he was so nervous anyway. Later rather than sooner, he took in a deep breath and rose from his position on the floor. He would be surprised if his guy was still awake out there.

He shook himself off and dusted off his clothes. No more room for mistakes. He was at least a bit more certain of what he wanted to say. He peeked out of the door of the bathroom and saw the other man, rubbing the leaves of a plant on the wall. It was time.

He started by just clearly his throat and whispering out a less than confident "hello".

The man instantly turned around and gave a smile as he sat back on the bed, patting beside himself. "Hello my love."

Sapnap smiled at that, but still traveled to sit on the bed just a few feet from the other man. "Sorry."

"What did you do wrong, doll?"

He was struck by that question a bit harder than he probably should have been, but regardless he answered as truly as he could. "I just was all over the place."

"That requires no apologies from me..." the man reached across and tapped Sapnap a few times on the knee. "Is that something you would usually apologize for?" Though his voice was smooth and caring, it was laced with something more sinister.

"Well I guess it depends on how miniscule the problem is. Usually I have little emotional fits over pointless stuff. So I apologize quite frequently."

The other man hummed. "That's unfortunate."

Sapnap swallowed, "Why is that? I'd rather apologize too often than not apologize enough."

"I am not surprised by your thinking sweetheart, just saddened. We will work on it together."

Sapnap fell silent. What else was he meant to say?

"But regardless, are you feeling okay? You are better now but I don't want to push you to do things if you are already on the precipice of falling."

Was he okay? After the random influx of emotions he seemed to have went back to baseline. But now he was back to craving physical contact to make him feel all warm and fuzzy. But the only person he had as comfort...

"Hello darling? Are you still in there?"

Sapnap blinked a few times, finally making contact with the other man. Without even thinking Sapnap blurted out, "cuddle me!"

The man seemed a little confused by that but regardless adjusted himself to where he was laying on his back. He patted his chest softly and waited patiently for Sapnap to move.

"Wait what?"

The man looked at Sapnap with just as much confusion. "Did I misunderstand?" He sat back up quickly.

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