Waiting For Us [COMPLETED]

chapter 18 - do better

Grayson:

I was internally panicking when Rowan mentioned my dad.

In the past, the word was light and fun. The sentences it was used in never made me feel worried, or scared, or want to curse the world for shitty luck like it does today.

Talia recognized my mood change in the car. My voice became quieter, more clipped. I spoke with the purpose of extracting the most information out of Rowan as possible. I knew she noticed the way my whole body paled, the blood rushing to God knows where. If she took my hand in hers like I secretly wanted her to—for comfort purposes—she would have felt cold skin. It would have only made her more worried.

I regretted leaving Talia standing alone in her driveway. I knew her eyes were watching me as I sped down her street and out of sight, racing to my least favorite location in the entire world.

The hospital is five miles from Washington D.C., so I could have easily gone straight away when driving back from the museum. It was the next exit after I hung up the phone on Rowan. I just didn't want to burden Talia with the fucking idea that my dad is fucking sick and is probably going to fucking die before he fucking gets to see me play a fucking game of basketball for fucking Duke. Excuse my language.

I don't need to share my problems with her. I'd rather keep her mind clear and happy.

The speedometer reaches 85 miles per hour as I cruise down the highway, back the way I just came. I merge over two lanes to the right at the last minute to catch my exit. The red lights make me anxious. The green lights make me worry, because I'm one signal closer to my location. Left, right, right, left, right—I shouldn't know these turns by heart at eighteen years old.

After parking in the neighboring parking garage, I sprint to the front entrance of the hospital, my mind already preparing for the worst. A defense mechanism so I don't become disappointed if the news is bad.

The automatic doors slide open at my arrival and I walk calmly into the waiting room. There's too much open space when everything feels like it's closing in.

Sophie, my oldest sister, notices me first and immediately gets off of her chair to hug me. On any other day I would have pushed her away from me, claiming she's being annoying, but I know today is different. So I hug her back.

"Have you heard anything?" I whisper as we pull apart. I try to ignore the tears brimming in her eyes.

She shakes her head and releases a wavering sigh. "No. He's been in surgery for an hour now."

"What happened?" I ask, even though I'm not sure I really want to know.

A tear falls down Sophie's face. "He had a heart attack, Grayson. It ruptured something in the process, I have no idea what, but they sent him into surgery. A helicopter from Philadelphia is flying in with a donor heart."