The Traveler and The Yaksha

The Traveler and The Yaksha's Wish

The day of Lantern Rite finally arrived.

Xiao stood at the top of Wangshu Inn, on the very tip of one of the protrusions that jutted from the inn's roof. The solitary inn was as calm as usual, even for a special occasion such as Lantern Rite. Most people were already in the far-off harbor city.

Xiao didn't pay it much mind, as he was focused on other thoughts. Such as the fact that he kept thinking about Aether's invitation to see the lanterns, and that he never accepted said invitation.

Aether has not brought it up again since the last time Xiao accompanied him on his commissions. But Xiao was sure that the idea was still very present in Aether's mind. And after the eventful week they just had, Aether has had many opportunities to ask Xiao again. Yet, he hasn't. Xiao cared to wonder if Aether had desisted from asking; with Xiao failing to give him a proper answer, or one at all.

When Xiao thought about that a heavy feeling settled in his chest, and it made him frown. A little voice at the back of his head implanted the idea that perhaps Aether finally realised that it was not worth it to be around him. That would explain why Aether has not shown up at the inn in the last few days.

It's for the best. Xiao has told himself many times. But that thought only deepened the heaviness in him. And it led to Xiao being more aware of Aether's absence. Which in turn caused Xiao to worry. Aether has made it a habit to stop by the inn. Especially since Xiao insisted on Aether resting in his little abode after his adventures.

There was a possibility that Aether was already starting to move on from Liyue. With such a long journey ahead there was no question that Aether was going to leave for Inazuma in the near future. And whenever that happened, chances were that he would never see Aether again.

Aether would leave, and Xiao, once more, would drown in the solitude that existed before Aether. Xiao would stay behind, dreaming about not being shackled by his karma, and not having to commit endless slaughter. He would have to once again have to bear maddening fear and seething anger by himself. All of which would threaten to consume him.

In a small way he envied Aether.

The spiraling flow of thoughts was stopped with a single shake of his head and a profound intake of breath.

Adepti don't desire ... I have committed atrocious things ... I cannot be with him ... even if ...

Dare he finish that thought, Xiao wasn't sure he could keep trying to convince himself about having no desire. The mere thought of him letting go of Aether kept pestering him, and regret had a vice grip upon his heart. Xiao was used to fighting and killing his own desires in the name of duty. However, slowly but surely, it was a battle he has been steadily losing since he met the peculiar traveler.

Adepti don't desire ... I am a weapon. I am bound by contract. I do not deserve him.

Xiao sought refuge in that mantra, but the more he repeated it, the more his chest tightened. And the more images about Aether would slip into his mind.

Xiao's closed eyes tightened more and his brows furrowed deeper. He gripped his shirt as he continued to fight his own thoughts and the feelings they caused.

Adepti don't desire. Even if it's with Aether, even if it's just once, I cannot go to Lantern Rite. It has no meaning to me ...

Or at least it shouldn't. This time of year brought awful memories accompanied by dread for Xiao: Yet for the briefest of moments he did entertain the thought that with Aether by his side, perhaps he could see things differently. Even if only a little.