Love is painful in two ways. It hurts to let go. It hurts to leave.
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Each time I caught him staring at me, he would just smile at me with an eyebrow raised and gave me a thumbs up, a sign asking if I was okay. I would just smile...
She was there, my best friend, the person I love, talking with Mark. She was surprised to see us, and she was horrified. She never expected us to come and see her.
I swear my heart broke when I saw her in a wheelchair.
"Shanshan..." A whisper escaped Lily's lips before pacing towards her to hug her. "Why are you doing this to us?"
Min Ho and I watched with sadness while both ladies reunited. They were hugging and crying.
"Please forgive me, unnie," Shanshan cried.
"Don't worry. I won't scold you."
"Be mad at me. I deserve it."
I wanted to run to her, but I was feeling terrible and afraid... afraid that she was still mad at me for what I did, but still, I needed to see her.
I observed her face. She was pale and yellowish. She obviously lost weight after coming here. My heart ached. "Why? How can something like this happen to her?" She looked pitiful yet trying to be strong, which made my heart hurt more.
My fingers closed into a fist. Not able to take it anymore, I ran away, leaving Min Ho, who was standing beside me.
I was running out of control outside the mansion and only stopping myself in the flower garden to catch my breath. I was crying, huffing heavily as my chest lets out the pain. I bent and held on to my wobbly knees for support.
"W-whyyyy... why her? Why?!"
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The words from the letter came back to my mind.
JK,
My precious bunny.
While writing these words, I'm already breaking into tears. I am sorry for always leaving you. In the end, I am the one who keeps breaking our promise. I'm going to leave you for real now.
I never want to say goodbye. Goodbye is a hurtful word. But I can't do anything. I am bound to say goodbye to the world and to my precious best friend.
To tell you what I truly feel, I want to spend many, many years with you. I want to cherish every single moment I spend with you. I just want to stay on your side and experience many things with you.
When I die, I hope you will remember me always, for I will never forget you. Do not exchange your best friend with other people, or I will haunt you in your dreams.
After I die, smile, and don't be sad, for you know that I am resting in peace. Think of our old memories and be happy.
You are the best thing that came into my life. I love you and will always love you.
