make it easy | young royals ✓

thirty

Wilhelm

The suitcase is propped open on the floor of my dorm room, and I'm pacing the room breathlessly, in the decision of what to pack for the upcoming trip that's fast approaching. I'm in careful deliberation and since I've put off packing for this trip for so long, it's scary to even begin.

When mom got wind of the excursion, she encouraged it despite what I thought she would've done. Over the phone, she told me she was 'proud' that I was 'moving forwards' and taking 'initiative' for my life and academics. I should've been mad at those condescending words, but I was so starved of parental validation that her words were almost sweet in my ears.

Hillerska is known to be a school of elites, housing daughters and sons of affluent families across the world. The school administration had assured everyone that security will be tight and extra cautious for the safety of the students. Knowing my conspicuous status, my bodyguards will be practically holding my hand throughout the entire time in Italy. It should sound unappealing, but simply thinking about strolling through the streets of Florence with Simon, gelatos in our hands is enough to make me overlook the inevitable negatives.

In the midst of the daydreaming and throwing t-shirts into the open suitcase, I didn't hear Sara inching the door open and coming into my room.

"Wilhelm."

Looking up and startled, I find her leaning against the desk staring at me expectantly. I find her presence peculiar because we aren't close and have never spoken to each other alone before. I wonder if something had happened to Simon.

"Hey, Sara!" I stand up, my hand still clutching the shirt I'm in the middle of folding.

"Hello." She appears bored, and I cast an assumption that Simon isn't in immediate danger like I previously thought.

"What are you doing here?" I ask her when she doesn't follow up with her polite greeting.

"What's going on with you and Simon?"

"What do you mean?" Continuing with my task, I hope to appear nonchalant and not like I've been obviously confronted.

"Are you guys still together?" Sara questions me, her directness is a surprise.

"Uhm," I debate the answer, but given her history with August, she definitely isn't one of the people I would consider confiding in. "No... I thought you knew we broke things off."

"I did know that."

I laugh lightly, hoping to sound calm but instead, it comes out tinted with nervousness. "Then what's the problem-?"

"It's odd, you know, how Simon seems to be so happy about it. I guess I didn't think he would be like that, considering how heartbroken he was."

Sara's words dig into me painfully despite how unreal they are. I have to restrain myself from turning around and proving to her that everything she and everyone else believes in is a well-orchestrated act. Inhaling slowly, I feel my heart jolt irregularly in my chest. "I make everything too complicated... I'm sure he's relieved I'm not placing all these burdens and rules upon him any more."

"You're right," she says without a hint of expression. "You're not good for him."

"What?" I can't help but say, feeling the sudden hints of insecurity and hurt creeping up upon me. "Did you always think that?"

"You caused him a lot of pain."

"When?" I browse my mind throughout our first few months together last year, and I didn't think Simon had told her all of our little fights and problems. Does his mom also think that I'm not good for him? That I was never good for him? A part of me died a little when he left.