My Name

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                                     Chapter Fifteen

            I woke up to the odd feeling of being watched. When I opened my eyes and rolled over, I found out I was. Dad was sitting there watching me. He had this wild look in his eyes I had never seen before. Then he spoke and his voice didn't sound the same either. He said he had never noticed how much I had grown before. He was looking at my whole body as if he was looking at something he was enjoying. He had this smile on his face that made my skin feel like it was crawling off of me. Then he grabbed me and said he was going to find out how much I had grown.

              He then lunged at me and pulled me out of bed by my legs. He was pulling and tearing my nightgown off of me, and I was screaming and trying to get away. He was grabbing me and hitting me and trying to pin me down to the floor. I managed to get free enough to reach my pillow. I had just enough time to grab the box cutter before he had me back on the floor.

               By this time my nightgown was completely ripped off of me and he was pinning me down with his legs as he pawed at me and touched me all over the top half of my body. Then he grabbed my underwear and started ripping them off as he shoved his knees against the top of my legs forcing them to open. The next thing I knew he was completely on top of me muttering how good I felt as he had his fingers inside me. I was screaming and crying harder than I had ever screamed before. Then as he went to undo his own pants I opened the box cutter.

           I slashed and cut and flung my arms as hard as I could. I must have cut him because he yelled out in pain. Then I realized I had my eyes closed this whole time. I opened them wide so I could see him as I kept slashing at him. Cut after cut after cut. I couldn't stop. I was now on top of him and I just kept cutting. Then I started stabbing too. I screamed out loud with every stab and slice.
Once I realized he wasn't moving anymore I got up. There was blood everywhere. He was covered in it and so was I. I turned and walked down the hall and saw mom was already gone. Then I went into the bathroom and cleaned the blood off of me.

               When I went back to my room and just stood there ready to pounce again if he moved. Once I realized he wasn't going to I grabbed my book bag, shoved some clothes into it and ran. I ran all the way to my shed before I noticed I was still naked. Once I was safely locked inside I got dressed. Then I went to the chimney and dug up the money and jewelry. I shoved them into the book bag with some of my favorite books. I didn't know where I was going, but I was going. I wasn't going to wait anymore. I wasn't going to stay and wait until I was older. I was leaving now. I grabbed a couple of flashlights I had stolen from the house and shoved them in my bag too. Then I shut the door to my shed one last time. I didnt even look back as I walked away.
I followed the river for what seemed like forever before I sat down beside it to rest a bit. The image of dad attacking me just kept playing over and over inside my mind like some bad movie stuck on repeat. Then I was screaming out and crying so hard and so loud that the birds stopped singing and flew away. Even the river itself seemed to go quiet. I screamed and cried so hard for so long I started throwing up. Then once my stomach was empty I continued to dry heave.

               My ribs hurt so much from this that I could barely breathe. I crawled over to a tree on my hands and knees and just laid under it asking myself why was I ever born? Why did my life have to be this way?

                I must have fallen asleep because the next thing I knew it was dark out. I grabbed a flashlight out of my book bag and started following the river again. I followed it until it came to a small bridge crossing over it with a dirt road. Then I followed the road. It wound around and through the woods and was very narrow in places. Even though it was in the woods it looked like it was traveled on a lot. I didn't know where it led to, but I followed it anyway. Sooner or later it had to go to something besides more woods. Then I noticed it changing.

                   It started sloping upward and the side of a mountain appeared on my left and a cliff started taking shape on my right. Off in the distance I could hear a loud vehicle coming. From the sounds of it it was a big truck of some kind. I hugged the edge of the road as best as I could so that it could get by me once it got to me. Then the road started getting narrower and the cliff taller. As the truck got closer my flashlight started dying. I stopped to get my other flashlight from my bag as the truck rounded the turn. It was a big dump truck. It was moving pretty fast for it to be on a dirt road. Then before I knew it, all I could see were its big headlights in my face. I felt a big thud as it hit me and then I could feel myself falling through the air as I went over the cliff. Then I felt like I did when I was going into surgery and everything slowly faded into nothing.

Do you want to know my name now?

Just call me Jane Doe. That's what everyone else is calling me..............................

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