Life After You

32.

"Breathe, breathe, breathe." Molly chanted as she wiped a cool cloth across Meredith's forehead.

"Where is he!" she growled through clenched teeth.

"You know, you wouldn't be so irritable if you would just listen to me and get the epidural." Lexie moaned "But YOU'RE the one in pain..."

"I know I'm in pain!" Meredith hissed "Where is my fucking husband!"

"Ok calm down." Molly sung "Calming breaths, we're being calm and cool and collected, we can do this."

"Where is Derek!" Meredith ignored her. "Where is HE!"

"I don't know." Lexie sighed "I called and harassed and threatened to throw a grenade in the guy's pants but they can't seem to find him either." Lexie took Meredith's free hand and tried to look sympathetic "But I promise you that they are trying VERY hard to find him."

"Ok, let's see where we're at!" Dr. Mallard said as she waltzed in the room.

"No." Meredith mumbled as tears sprung from her eyes "No, he is not going to miss this! He promised me he wouldn't! And he needs to be here right now! I have been at this for eight hours! My god I could be pushing any minute!" They heard the doctor snicker to herself at the end of the bed, they all looked down at her as she snapped her gloves off "What?"

"I wouldn't be too worried dear." She smiled "You're only five centimeters."

"FIVE!" Meredith gasped "That's it! Does that mean that I've got another eight hours of this crap!"

Dr. Mallard just smiled through her teeth "Call me if you change your mind on pain medication."

"Epidural." Lexie coughed as she sat down in the chair next to Meredith's bed.

"I'm not getting the stupid epidural." Meredith glared "It's bad for the baby, and it raises the risk for a c-section and I'm the surgeon, I'm the one cutting people open, not the other way around and..." she tightened her jaw as another contraction ripped through her abdomen "OOWWWEEE!!!! Son of a bitch! WHERE IS HE!!!"

"Right here!" they heard in the doorway and all heads whipped up to see a tall dark haired man in uniform rushing through the door, Molly quickly moved out of the way so he could take her place, Meredith's eyes filled with tears again as he took her hand and kissed her forehead "I'm sorry I almost broke my promise."

"You're here." She squeaked out "I'm not imagining things."

"No." he chuckled "You're not imagining things."

She narrowed her eyes and reached up and yanked the collar of his shirt with an iron grasp as she spoke through her teeth "Then help me fucking focus here!"

"Ok!" he gasped "I see your sisters haven't talked you out of your natural birth plan?"

"NO!" she growled.

"Alright then." He said calmly and unclenched her fingers from his shirt collar, he softly started stroking her hand "Close your eyes, breathe slowly, it'll be over in two seconds."

Derek coached her breathing until the contraction was over and she opened her eyes and looked at him relieved.

"I'm glad you made it." She mumbled.

"I am too." He smiled "I was terrified I would be too late."

"Oh, here comes another one!" Molly said. Derek looked up at the monitor as a contraction was starting to peak "Man they're getting close!"

"Ok Mer, close your eyes and breathe." Derek said calmly "Breathe, breathe."

"OWWEE!" Meredith gasped "Owe! Owe! Owe! It's burning!"

"It's burning?" Derek frowned "What's burning?"

"IT...is burning." Meredith said through her teeth.

"Oh boy, ok um." Molly panicked and hit the call button "We need Dr. Mallard in here now!"

"What does it mean?" Derek asked "What's happening."

"The baby is coming genius!" Lexie scoffed

The doctor came flying in a second later "What are you feeling Meredith? I just checked you."

"It's burning." Meredith gasped as she tried to breathe deeply "It hurts!"

The doctor lifted the blanket and gasped "Oh alright, it's baby time!" she pulled some gloves on and sat down on the end of the bed "Alright this won't take long just one nice push."

Meredith grunted a little as she started to bear down and felt the pain intensify so she gasped and laid back "Oh my god that hurts!"

"It'll be over quick Meredith." Dr. Mallard said "Just one big push."

"No." Meredith shook her head "No I don't want to do that again, it hurts too much."

"Mer baby," Derek soothed "It'll be over quick you just have to do what the doctor says."

"No." she shook her head and started to cry "No I don't want to do this anymore, I don't want to do it. I want the epidural, just give me the damn epidural!"

Derek choked a little, not wanting to see her in pain either he turned to the doctor "Can she get the epidural?"

"It's too late, she just needs to push and it'll all be over."

"No, no I'm not going to push." Meredith shook her head and sniffled "I want the fucking epidural now!"

"Meredith." Derek breathed out and placed both hands on the sides of her face, forcing her to look at him through her tears "This is what you wanted, this is what you planned. Baby you are so very strong, and beautiful and you are not a quitter. It'll be over in a second if you just push, so push!"

Meredith took a deep breath and nodded, she pressed her lips together and grunted hard as she pushed down and tried to push through the pain.

"Just one more, tiny push Meredith!" the doctor encouraged.

Meredith gasped down another breath and pushed again through the pain. She felt almost instant relief as they heard a suctioning sound and then a tiny little cry that filled the room. She opened her eyes as Dr. Mallard placed the baby on her chest and she burst into tears immediately. Derek leaned in and kissed her, she felt moisture on his cheeks as he leaned over and kissed the gooey crying baby.

"You did it!" Derek grinned "Meredith it's over, you did it."

"Oh god Derek." She cried "She's so beautiful... it's still a she right?"

Derek chuckled as he leaned over and looked, then grinned "It's definitely a girl." He smiled and placed a soft kiss on the baby's head full of matted down hair "A beautiful, beautiful girl."

Baby Shepherd: