You're Supposed To Be//Billie Eilish

chapter 1

willows pov:

"shut the fuck up"

i rolled my eyes at her. it was currently at around 1am and all i wanted to do was go to sleep but jessie just wouldn't stop shouting.

"could you just be a bit more quiet. i don't want the neighbors to knock at our door."

"i said shut up."

she just screamed louder. oh god. i shoved around a bit to get comfier and held the covers closer to me. i looked away from my girlfriend and closed my eyes. i managed to successfully ignore her while she kept shouting at me for literally no reason as i felt myself drift of to sleep.

that was before jessie pulled the covers away from me. i opened my eyes again as i felt the cold air hit my body, that was now just covered in an oversized t-shirt and panties.

"what the hell. why did you do that?"

"leave. i want you to leave."

she pointed to the door of our room. i did't move. she couldn't be serious. i had nowhere to go as this was our apartment.

"and where am i supposed to go?"

"i don't care. do what you want. i just don't want you here anymore."

she now roughly pulled my arm and shoved me to the door.

"wait. i don't have anything to wear. i can't go out like that."

she hesitated for a moment but then turned around to our closet to grab the nearest sweatpants and sweatshirt. a part of me adored how she still cared at least a tiny little bit for me. the part that let me come back every time she did things like that. but the bigger part was just angry. she pressed the clothes in my arms just to turn me around and lead me to the front door.

"come on, jessie. don't do that. you'll regret it tomorrow."

"i'm being dead serious. get out of my sight."

i was now stood in the cold hallway in front of our apartment only barefoot and only my shirt, my phone, my wallet and my keys together with my clothes in my arms.

"jessi-"

i was cut of by the door slamming in my face. uh, she was always so annoying. i knocked on the door.

"open the door now, please. jessie, let me in."

after five more minutes of pleading jessie to let me in, i finally gave up. i put my clothes on and slid down the wall, my head in my hands. it was not the first time of her kicking me out but i still let a few tears drop.

i went on my phone and called the first number, which happened to be my best friend casper. he picked up after the fifth time.

"bitch, what do you want. you know how late it is? i was tryna slee-"

he stopped when he heard my quiet sobs.

"oh baby, what happened? did she do it again?"

"hmm-"

"are you still there? alright, stay where you are, i'll come pick you up."

he quickly ended the call and i sunk down even more. i now had time to think. again the fight was just about some stupid little thing, i didn't even remember. jessie just happened to take everything wrong and make it seem like it was my fault.

she didn't hit me this time, i was glad about that. that happened sometimes, too, that she hit me. afterwards, she always came running saying sorry and she didn't mean it like that and my stupid ass forgave her every time of course.

my thoughts got interrupted by caspers arms pulling me into a warm hug.

"how bad was it this time?"

"well, i don't even have socks, so..."

i laughed it off.

"did she hit you?"

i shake my head, no.

"okay, come on, baby, let's get you home, yeah?"

i nodded.

time skip to the next morning:

when i woke up the first thing i noticed was the sweet smell of pancakes and coffee. i rolled out of the bed in caspers spare room. i still wore the clothes from last night and quickly changed into some new ones. i always had a few things at caspers as it wasn't the first time of me staying here without a change of clothes.

i made my way downstairs to see casper standing in the kitchen, making us breakfast. he really was the cutest. when he turned around to put the plate in his hands down and he saw me, he came to me and hugged me, without saying a word.

we sat down in silence and started eating the vegan pancakes he made. i was the first one to say something.

"i'll talk to her. i just don't kno-"

"no, you'll not talk to her. you did this to many fucking times. you'll run back to her and in a week it'll all start over again. you are my best friend, i can't let you do this again."

"but-"

"no, this time there is no but. listen to me, you may love her but baby, that's not how it's supposed to look like, okay? your partner is not supposed to hit you and kick you out all the time. also, you make it so easy for her. you give in so quickly, girl."

"it's not that easy. we've been together for so long."

"i know and it's now time to let go. it's not healthy what you have. please break up with her."

"it sounds so easy from you mouth, but it isn't. what would you say if i told you to break up with alex, huh?"

"you know that's something else. we aren't toxic."

by now i was just pissed. i knew casper was right but i just didn't want to admit it to myself. i stormed upstairs und laid on the bed, my face hidden in the pillows. after a few minutes a soft knock was heard and then the door opening. i felt the bed dip and a hand slowly stroking my back.

"i'm sorry, will. i didn't mean it to come off so harsh. i'm just angry at her not at you, okay? also, i don't have any right telling you to break up with her. i'm sorry."

i turn around, looking in guilty eyes.

"it's okay. i know what you meant and i also know you're right. i just- give me time, okay? but i'll do it soon, i promise."

he pulls me in for a hug and i hug him back tightly.

"you know i love you and i just want what's best for you, will."

"i know and i love you too."

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(1125 words)

feeeeww, wow the first chapter. how are we feeling? i hope y'all liked that. also, it's the first book i've ever written and it's also english, so please don't come for me.

any questions?