Spotify - soulmate au, SakuAtsu

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After a lot of thinking, I was completely sure of my feelings for Sakus and decided to finally tell my soulmate. I didn't want to give him false hope although I didn't think that he liked me. We didn't really know each other after all. I was still scared of his reaction. If my soulmate told me that he was in love with someone else three months ago, I probably would've cried. Hopefully, my soulmate wasn't like that, I didn't want to hurt him. He was a really nice person.

But I needed to be honest and tell him. Therefore, I added the songs I'm in Love by Ola, with by Chiccote's Beats and Someone Else by Duncan Laurence. Because I felt guilty, I also added Sorry by Halsey. Now I just needed to wait for his reaction.

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I got a notification. Recently, Spotify had added a feature where you get a notification every time your soulmate adds a song to your shared playlist. I immediately activated it. Now I wish I hadn't. It would have saved me a lot of pain. I would have found out eventually but I wished I found out later.

I opened Spotify to find the words I'm in Love with Someone Else Sorry written on my screen. Tears shot into my eyes. He liked someone. Just a few days ago I asked Atsu if he liked someone and he told me that he didn't. Now he did. He fell in love with someone. And that someone wasn't me. He would be happy with them. WIth that other person that captured his heart.

Yet, I was happy for him. He deserved it. He deserved to be happy. But I wasn't the cause of this happiness. Without thinking, I clicked on the last song he added. Sorry by Halsey. Listening to the song hurt. It fit so well. "Sorry to my unknown lover" and "Someone will love you but someone isn't me" hurt the most. I was that unknown lover that he didn't and wouldn't ever love.

I added It's Ok by Tom Rosenthal and i'm glad that you found someone by sad alex, gnash. I meant it. I was happy that he found someone because as long as he was happy, I was alight. But it hurt. It hurt so much. If Atsu listened to the song, he would find out that I wasn't all that happy but he probably wouldn't.

He replied with the song Thank You by Dido and I added :) by La+ch in response. Then I closed Spotify, locked my phone and put it on the table next to me, buried my head in my pillow and started crying.

I was okay with Atsu not liking me but it hurt that he liked someone else. I spend so much time with him, yet he still didn't catch feelings for me. What did I do wrong? Was I really that unlovable?