death by paper cut

shortcut through us

picture this:
seventeen, rotting in bed. my skin practically attached to the bedsheet as she walks in. eyes heavy with sleep, xanax coated napkins are all i've known in the heat of august. chey was always too good for me. too pure. she cleans my room as i sleep. the ash making itself into her ribcage. that's what i never wanted, don't you know? to taint her with my own unholy trilogies. to ruin her in the haze of boy in and boy out.
-end scene!

picture this:
at the park with her/ stolen kisses/ bleach blonde hair sticking up everywhere/ i can practically smell the chlorine/ holds me as if everything will be okay/ and i'm not sure it will after those men took away my dignity/ did they take away yours too? / have they gutted us?/ shy chey/ sweet like candy/
-end scene!

picture this:
we are eighteen and we are beautiful. we want to run away to a far away place. change our names in the car, pick out the new faces we will make. but instead, we are cutting mdma pills with razorblades. a sick joke, maybe so. they were attached to my thigh an hour before. and , i know i know i know- this sounds terrible. but its a cheap one way ticket to happiness. joker style joy.
-end scene!

picture this:
never knew what to say/ back of the car/ lips chapped/ rocket launcher mouth/ my anger always blaring and red/ how do you put up with me?