Inhumane

034

***this is a double update! chapter 033 and 034 were published TODAY. make sure you're reading 033 first. 

PAIGE- TEN YEARS PRIOR

I am asleep. This is what I tell myself with my eyes closed and my cheek pressed against my pillow that smells like my lilac shampoo that mama made for me. It feels like I am waiting for something, but I don't quite know what. Maybe I'm waiting for a kiss goodnight from mama or daddy, maybe I am awaiting sleep...

She comes through my door, carrying with her the familiar scent of her floral perfume she sometimes wears. Always, mama is quiet as she slips into the dimness of my room and comes around to the side of my bed that is to my back. Mama rests one knee on the bed that slouches lightly under her weight. Her warm hand rests upon my back and then rubs the length of it in a gentle comforting stroke. I want to sigh with the warmth she brings me. I know when she's around, everything will be okay. I know when she's around, I feel the safest.

I almost open my eyes. Almost. I want to see her face and feel her hug with my own arms. But I don't. I don't want to ruin the moment of quiet we have between us. And then I remember why I am in here so early and why I just can't bare to look at her quite yet. The memory of her and daddy screaming at each other is still fresh in my mind. The sound of slamming doors and cupboards and even a dish shattering on the tile of the kitchen.

I slip further inside of myself.

For a second, I think she's about to leave. And then she lays down behind me and wraps me in her warm embrace. Her nose buries itself in my hair and she kisses my head over and over. A tear slips out of my eye and runs down my cheek into my hair.

"I love you so much," she whispers. "I am sorry." Over and over, she kisses my head and whispers into my neck as she holds me to her chest.

And then she get's up. I don't move until I hear the click of the door and her footsteps carry her down the stairs, not towards her bedroom. Outside, her car hums to life and the sound of her tires on the gravel carries down the driveway and into the dark night.

After she leaves, I feel cold. And the coldness persists for years to come.

COLLETTE- THE SAME DAY

There are two things in the world that I look forward to. My baby girl and him.

Am I a terrible person for thinking of him and not my husband? It doesn't feel terrible like I thought it would, loving a wolf. It feels like the best and most right thing in the world. But it is unbearable too, because every time I leave him, a part of me remains with him. And yet I can't seem to bring myself to make the move and take my daughter to him. He promises we will get away, that we can start a new life.

I just can't believe him.

You can't escape a man like Samuel.

When I am in his arms though, it feels like I can do anything in the world. But I know reality is the chains that hold me to the house on the mountain where my girl is. And even if I love the wolf, I love my girl more.

We're laying in his bed, my head is on his chest and my fingers are stroking up and down his hard abdomen. Even laying down his physique is magnificent, better than any man I have ever seen. After a while of silence, his hand stops mine and I look up at him.

"Stay with me. Please, Collie, stay." It is only the millionth time he's asked, but this time I manage to formulate an answer.

"My daughter, Arlo. I can't just leave her." My brows furrow in, I find the thought ridiculous.