Unnatural~ (Killua x Male Reader)

My Fault...

Killua's POV

I don't know what happened... he just stares into the flames with not a smile in sight. I know he isn't normally as happy-go-lucky as Gon but I'd at least expect a greeting of some sort. He didn't even look at me!

Killua "hello...? (Y/N)...?"

I walked closer to him but the closer i got, the more my heart ached as the details of his became clearer... he looked so miserable. Pale and the glow he usually have in his eyes were gone, replaced by fog... Just the sight of him like this makes me wish whatever I'm in is a nightmare and that I'll wake up soon to see him in his usual self. Despite this, i managed to pull up the guts and sit next to him.

Killua "(Y-Y/N)... are you okay...?"

(Y/N) "He's gone... It's your fault..."

Wh-what? What does he mean? Who's gone?

He didn't mention any name and kept on looking towards the fire as if expecting me to know what he meant or who he was referring to. Could it be Gon or Pina? But in that sense he'd only be worried for Gon and even then I don't think it'd bring him to this state.

Wait... where's Ryuu...?

(Y/N) "You were too weak... you couldn't face your fears... now he's gone..."

As i became aware of the revelation, my breathing became shaky and i could hear my heartbeat echoing in my eardrums. A knot started to form in my throat is i try to figure out what to even say. No words came to mind and my throat felt dry.

But wouldn't that be Impossible? Ryuu can't die if (Y/N) is still alive! But... he isn't here.

(Y/N) suddenly stood up and walked away from me. I got up too but stayed my distance and looked at him from afar as my mind is still processing everything.

He looked to have grabbed something from a table before turning around and slowly walking towards me. Cradled in his arms, a ball of bloody cloth.

He stopped ahead of me and extended his arms. I took the assumption that he wanted to give whatever he was holding to me so i took it into my arms.

I didn't really know what he wanted but then i looked to his eyes. Utter disgust... the gaze he gave me is grinding away on my soul and my sanity. All traces of reason left me as all i wanted to do was get rid of that look on his face and make him smile again. I don't care what i have to do! I'll kill someone if i have to! Anyone! Just don't look at me like you hate me, (Y/N)...

He pointed a finger at the cloth-ball i was holding. I slowly took it apart the blood-stained fabric fold by fold until i reached it's core and my heart sank...

I can feel myself getting colder. blood halted in it's tracks, my heartbeat silenced, my jaw dropped, my eyes opened wide with fear, and whatever air i held between my breaths left my body. Any thoughts i previously had vanished instantly and I could only look at the dark metalic object in my arms in horror of what to come by it's presence...

The Blade of Woe...

My eyes slowly dotted back up to (Y/N). his eyes locked with mine for a split second before he closed them and bowed his head down slightly, exposing his neck. No words nor instruction came from him but i felt tears painfully prick the edges of my eyes. I knew what he was telling me to do... I knew what he wanted but... I can't do it...

Please...

If there is any Fate out there...

Don't make me do this...

anything but this....